Here is another entry in the "movies that did quite well, but no of the Dads no it exists" category. REAL STEEL is the story of Hugh Jackson and the tender story of the rekindling of the broken father & son relationship through their mutual love of boxing robots.
Jackman plays the absolutely appalling human being Charlie Kenton. He's a down on his luck gambling ex boxer who sells his son for US$50,000 (not adjusted for inflation). Despite not displaying a single redemptive characteristic throughout the overly long run time, the parental bond grows. Set to a backdrop of fighting robots, which is surprisingly dull, the predicable story meanders its way to the ending you can see coming a mile off.
Dan and Sidey pick the bones out of this one, with Pete refereeing the contest. Christmas no 1 or Christmas turkey. We will let you know....
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Until next time, we remain...
Dan: in a five four.
Sidey: You didn't say two or what?
Dan: I didn't. No , but I had otherwise a solid countdown for our our review of Real Steel.
Sidey: Well, before we get into that, should we just take a few moments to reflect on our respective Christmas holidays?
Dan: Well, okay. Yeah.
Sidey: How was yours, Daniel?
was pretty good, pretty nice.
I had I've had time off, so I've been spending it with friends and family.
wine, women and song. Peter, how's yours been going?
Pete: It's mostly ghastly.
Dan: Mm-hmm. .
Sidey: Because you were with friends and family
Pete: mostly. Yeah. Yeah. Well, mostly family, friends, friends I can put up with. But family no, it was all, it was all fine.
But now the aftermath, like kids with presents and they dunno how they work and then there's like fights and tantrums and.
Dan: Yeah. There's a, there's a, there's a fair few batteries and things
Pete: Oh, it's not even that. It's just Yeah. Games and they dunno how to connect things and stuff and yeah. My miss is called my seven year old just now on FaceTime a fucking wanker, So that's
Dan: getting a little
Pete: that's a level. Yeah.
Dan: that's, we, we actually did it slightly different this year in, in that we celebrated the whole family on the 24th.
Dan: In the evening, six o'clock. And then just had like two boxing days. So Christmas was effectively a boxing day where we just ate and drank.
Nobody really cooked or anything. Had load of stuff left over a few little bits, roast potatoes and stuff. And then on Boxing Day, we did Boxing Day again.
and, and actually was pretty, pretty good. Yeah. I'll, I'll go for that again.
we did, we just did the normal stuff. We did round to the in-laws Christmas day.
I was actually feeling pretty ropy.
Dan: Was that because of Christmas Eve?
Sidey: No I'd
Dan: Dodgy mince pie?
Sidey: no, it was like, like I'd come down with the hideous cold, but I just blitzed it with loads of port and wine and it seemed to go away after a day. Some of the surplus produce has made it round here.
So we've got some cheese, we've got some stilton and some some other blue toast. We've got the toast, we've got the Heston, what was it called? Tipsy stilton pot thing. It's is a sensation. We've got some pickles and some peanuts and a selection of confectionary as well,
Dan: Re regular listeners will know that's not normal toast.
Sidey: No, no, that's toast for cheese.
Specific top of the pile in terms of
Pete: all, all other crackers are now redundant effectively,
Dan: which actually segues quite nicely, doesn't it?
Sidey: Into this. Well cuz what we're doing is basically two midweeks this week, and the first one that we're gonna do, we're taking it back to 2011.
Dan: We are looking for Christmas crackers or will it be a Christmas Turkey?
Sidey: Well, let's find out, because this was Real Steel. Never heard this one. We were debating on WhatsApp group about what to watch.
And we were gonna do we and we are going to do a Henry Caval themed week. . But Reeks is very excited about that.
So we'll wait till he's back from his Christmas holes.
Pete: Ah. So instead of Man of Steel,
Sidey: we went real steel. I'd never heard of this, but this is a huge Jackman
Dan: Yeah. And I'd never watched it before, although I had heard it and it was just, sounded like a ridiculous premise.
And it is because we're, we're kind of in the future. And Hughes Jackman is a boxer, A failed boxer. Yeah. Who is now boxing with robots effectively. He's got
Sidey: They just call 'em bots. Yeah. And he has a bot.
Dan: And it's a big thing. It is like in this future world, boxing has been outlawed
Sidey: It's, it's the future, but it's our past now. Cause it's 2020, this was set.
Pete: It's probably worth saying that I've not seen this. I didn't watch
Sidey: it. You can be the arbor.
Pete: I'll be the ombudsman Yeah. Of, of quality.
Dan: of how good
Pete: you, I'll decide whether it, whether it is a cracker or a
Turkey, as you said. So, yeah. So talk
Dan: so he's a boxer.
Think rocky with robots.
Sidey: Well, we're introduced to him.
First of all, he, that's the tagline of the film.
Pete: Yeah. And, and the thing is, with that as a premise, it could go either way. It's not gonna be mediocre. It's either gonna be brilliant if it's done in a
Yeah. Ludicrous way. Yeah.
Or it's gonna be total cow shit.
Sidey: Well, they play it straight.
Pete: Okay. So they buy, so they buy into it
Sidey: Yeah, but they introduce huge Jackman. He looks like a trucker. He's just driving along. He's got his aviator shades, like ripped sleeves off
Pete: I'm getting wolves, I'm getting Wolverine vibes like straight away
Dan: in the morning, waking up in a trailer looking for a beer to drink. You know, like just that kind of
Pete: on hard times, which in, in American films is like huge alcohol problem.
But in Britain, that's like, you are a legend mate. Yeah. That's how we all want to live our
Sidey: So he is touring around the country with his bot called Ambush, I think from memory, and he's just goes and does the, there's, there's basically a league, like a premier league of bot fighting.
But here's, this is.
Sidey: this is like
Dan: Al conference, you know, he, he's Sunday
Sidey: League. He's outside the football league here that we were into
Pete: so he's ran amateur.
Sidey: Yeah. So he's, he goes and there's someone that he's had previous with who he's robbed money off for. He's, he's had a
Dan: on a bet or something like that
Sidey: done, done this guy day and they, they've pre, pre-agreed that he's gonna have a fight and he kicks off as soon as he gets there because his robot is gonna fight a bull. And as soon as he sees it, he says, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm supposed to be fighting. 800 pound bull. This one's like a couple of thousand at least.
So he's obviously thinking, well, I'm up against it here. So what he does cleverly is he goes all in with this guy and says, actually, I'll take the fight. And the guy's like, I'll give you. 5,000 for the fight winner takes all. And he's like, no, no, 20 grand.
Dan: Because I'm not kind of sure on how this is gonna go. I'm doubling down and we get a sense of the character hug. Jackman is now, and he is a massive idiot. Like he has absolutely no business
Pete: I was gonna say this reminds me of you, Dan. Pretty much any sort of like competitive sport or game or something, you go, you come flying out of the gates with, I'm gonna take all you chomps down.
Dan: Well, if it looks like you're gonna lose and you've only got one chance to win and it's gotta be like, this is what Hugh
Pete: but you know, you can still lose.
Pete: if you're not very good.
Sidey: the guy says,
Pete: can I
Sidey: just, yeah, you can quickly
Pete: like, just so I understand, So this isn't people, Hugh Jackman isn't fighting against his bot
Sidey: he has, he has a, a large oversized metal looking controller for his bot.
And his bot goes into the bull ring and fights the bull. Right. And actually it's, it's done pretty effectively. They used quite a lot of practical effects. They did build. Great big bot things, and then obviously they'll be CGI for the fights.
Yeah. But they did have them like working
Pete: and, and normally these bots don't fight. Are the bots they fight? No, they don't.
Sidey: This is the first time we see it, is the only time you see a non bot
Pete: Oh, okay. Got you, got
Dan: you. And he's, he's just lowest of the low here because he's, he's
to get some money. He.
His robot isn't in great condition and he, he knows it, but he's just too blind and he thinks probably like, even if I lose, I'm gonna, I'm gonna ditch out and not pay this guy anyway.
Sidey: The guy says exactly what, well, the guy says he ends up doing right. 20 grand. It's on. If you fucking try and run away after this fight, I will beat you within an inch of your life. . And that's exactly what says and blah, blah, blah. And you can tell which way this is gonna go. And they have the fight and the bull, he starts off quite well.
He punches the bull. And then after that, the bull just takes him,
Dan: well, what happens?
He catches the eye of, or a girl in the crowd, a beautiful girl and he's a bit of, a bit of a ladies man and his eyes. And suddenly he's looking at her, giving her the eye, showing off, and the ball comes round and charges the robot and he loses and it just turns into be a load of rust crap in the, in the car.
And he's desperately trying to get away and load everything up. And the guy comes along, doesn't he? And. In fact, he does get away, doesn't he? Does he just
Sidey: The he's got, he's got two kind of hoodlums that come up and he beats, he punches one cheap shot, throws dust in the other one's face and doesn't run.
Pete: and the bot as, as
Sidey: is that like the arms come off, it's been completely mangled. Fuck
Pete: the bar
Sidey: he takes it, but it's a write off. It's a complete write off. But what happens during the fight is you get a couple of shots of the violence a few bits, and it looks okay, but basically a lot of it is camera looking away from the fight at huge Jackman.
at the crowd reaction shots of people screaming, shouting, flinging their controls around the air. It goes on FRAs and it, it continues that way. And if you don't like that, like I didn't it, it freaking was pretty annoying. So you're
Dan: excitement within the Thunder drone here and everybody's shouting for their robots and everybody's got their favorites.
But his is out the pitcher now and he goes back to what is like a huge warehouse with a boxing ring and a beautiful gal who works on robots, and that's kind of his home base,
Sidey: Well, it's Evangeline Lilly. You'll remember her from Lost if you ever watched that. She,
Pete: I know the name.
Sidey: She is.
Sidey: Did you see Aunt Man in the wasp? She's the wasp.
Pete: oh, she's super hot.
Sidey: I don't like her a, she's a proper conspiracy
Pete: in the
Sidey: she's in rings hobbit.
Pete: The Hobbit, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Super hot.
Sidey: She's a complete conspiracy nut, though. She's a dick. She is the daughter of his former boxing coach or something, and she gives him plenty of pep talks about stuff. Then it emerges that he has an estranged child who's gonna be signed over to some people.
Dan: His, his, no, his wife's sister. Luckily for him, his wife's dead. And he can then sell his kid to his sister.
Sidey: He says
Dan: her, his wife's sister who really
Sidey: a negotiation going on and he says, let the kid spend the summer with me. And then give me 50 k
Dan: They, they've got all
Sidey: money to buy a new bot Basical.
Dan: And he sees
Pete: sell his own child.
He never, to
Dan: anyway. It's better off with someone else. It sounds a smart transaction there. Yeah. So he's thinking money for nothing. Well wait a minute. I can just make some money at this because his his.
Sister wife. His sister-in-law's husband is Brewster.
He's millions, you know, he's got loads. So he just goes, he can see how much she wants it. So he goes to him and goes, you know how much she wants this kid? Why don't you give me 50 grand, let the kids stay with me for the summer. Then it's like, you can go over and actually it's the guy. He goes, no, we want to go on holiday.
I'd rather him not be
Sidey: watch, did you watch the game?
The Michael Douglas one. Oh, okay.
Dan: Oh, he's the guy in
Sidey: go signs him up.
Dan: Yeah. But so he's They've made this deal where he's gonna get 50 grand now, have the kid for the summer, 50 grand at the end. Brilliant. He's like, well, the kid's gonna be better off with them anyway and I'll get money for the robot, which is exactly
Dan: And he goes and buys a new robot. He's
Sidey: oh, he's a great asshole throughout the film, it's, he's very consistent. He sends Evangel, Lil Basical is sent off and she like, sources another robot. It's cool looking one, it's from Japan. It's voice activated. So we lose the stupid controller thing for a bit.
He's big than him up. Led to believe that this is the greatest. It's called Noisy Boy. They all have these stupid names. He's purple. He has Asian writing
Dan: Purple and yellow. He looks kick ass and he is called Noisy boy. And he's just gonna take, and he's all, his paint is really looking great and everything.
He's, he just looks amazing. But, but then you've
Sidey: well, the,
kid kicks off about the fact that he's been
Dan: Well, yes. So the kids straightaway, he's, he's onto it. He's just like Hughes Jackman. Little bit less asshole and much more business acumen and he's, he's straight away going, well, what are you doing? Look, you've just made 50 grand off me.
I want 25 of it,
Pete: which is fair
Dan: You know, you've sold me.
Pete: kid is how old?
Sidey: to some of that. You know how I enjoy child actor performances?
Sidey: This is right up there. This is, I mean, it's right up
Dan: he, he is, he's really good. I'm glad you said
And what you, what you, what you discover, cuz we're about 30, 40 minutes in now, is that it's gonna become less about the fighting and more about this fucking irritating child. Yeah.
Pete: I'm, I'm feeling, I'm feeling that there might be some sort of redemption story coming
Sidey: Not really. Not really.
Dan: nah. But,
but what we have got now is a begrudging respect from Hugh Jackman to this little shit who's invaded his life. Because he start, yeah, yeah. Because he started to Understand noisy boy and how he can work and the voice
Sidey: because the kid has played video games. He can speak fluent Japanese and is able to give instructions to the robot and how to fight. Of course. But it's still up to huge jackmans. They go to the next fight.
It's, it's kind of an underground, it's still not, it's still not within the proper referees. Cause there are referees.
Yeah, it's, it's, yeah, it's cage fighting. So noisy boy is gonna fight, and again, he ups the an gimme, gimme the, like one that's top of the bill cuz an Anthony Mackey is running the show.
He's Falcon from the Marvel films. Got He, do you remember this reminded me a lot of Running Man, where there's, there's guys up on a platform taking all the bets.
Pete: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sidey: how we're introducing him. He's the guy doing that, but he's also kind of running the whole thing. Yeah. And he says, tell you what, I'll give you a fight on the undercard.
You can fight like some wanky and you get a couple of thousand. And he's like, no, no, I want, I want the top billing. He's like, you wanna fight Midas? And he is like, yeah, gimme Midas. And so he does I think
Dan: they're all telling him, take a, take a, you know, take an undercard, you'll just get free. No, he doesn't wanna do it. Sure enough.
Eggs is eggs. He gets absolutely stomped on
Sidey: but it starts off okay. He's, he's, he's doing a bit, a few, few hits. Yeah. And you are thinking they're gonna do okay, but no, he ends up getting decapitated
Dan: so the 50 grand that he just spent on this
Pete: straight down the Kermit
Dan: And so they go to this end up going to straightaway like, oh, well, okay, look on the bright side, he's just one of those guys.
And he goes straight over to like a scrap center, breaks in there and starts pulling out bits to re repair. The robot, you know, he's looking for the future. It's a great example to the kid, , look,
Pete: never more
Dan: about the disappointment, we're gonna go and steal something that's gonna get his back on track. And as they do that, he's saying, look, get away from the edge, cuz it's just like a cliff.
But the edge just then collapses cuz it's pissing down with rain. And we think we've lost him. We think we've lost Charlie because he slid down this kind of dam. It's like the end of a dam. He's just gone down. He's slid down, but he's held on and there's an arm that comes out the.
and it's just held onto his jacket.
And Hughes Jackman leisurely makes his way down just in case the kid isn't dead or to pick up the pieces. And sure enough, he's there. He is surprised. Wow. He's got him, he still makes a hash and still makes it a lot harder, like risking his life
Sidey: And then he says to the kid, cuz the kid's like, oh, what about this robot, this, these bits,
Dan: Robot. There's a whole robot just covered in the
And he's like, if you fucking want him, you can fucking drag him out. The dirt
Dan: kid is just slid down like 300 meters. He's held on like his sheer death and he's just like, this arm has saved him. And he goes, I wanna, I want that, you know, as a memento for nearly losing my life.
Yeah. And get, and he going, yeah, well if you want it, you get it. It's like 300 meters up. He's got a car. Get a WeCh and everything. So cut to the morning and he's wheeling it forward to the truck where Hughes Chapman has just taken a night in the truck, I guess, and just slept
Sidey: outta Yeah, they take it back. It's
Dan: been like illegally nicking from a,
Sidey: yeah, but it, it goes, it goes back to the warehouse, isn't it?
With Evangeline Lilly. And she she starts wiring it up again and let, oh, let's just see if it's any good. Oh, it's a fucking shy one from the, like, it's the second gen of bots, you know, it's, it's been fucking turd. And you're like, oh, here we go.
Dan: Yeah. It's like an, it's like an, the original iPod or something. He's got, you know, he's just, he just pulled it out and, but back in those days, built to last and it's got some,
Sidey: it's got a shadow feature. It's a sparring robot. So it's, it's built to take punishment, but it can't dish out anything particularly, but it will also mimic
Pete: are, these like senti.
Sidey: No. And the whole way through. I'm waiting for this fucking, so you get to the end fight. So I'm, I was waiting for it to turn around and do like a fucking thumbs up or something, but it
Dan: But the, the boy, the boy does believe after he gets it up, so
Sidey: it was just suspended. It was just sticking out. It didn't grab
Pete: So, got it, got
Sidey: it by
Dan: But this the boy does believe, That he does have a little bit about him. He can understand him.
Dan: And, and so at different times when he asks him to dig deep, Pete, don't get me there yet.
Sidey: But while, while all this has been going on, you do get glimpses of like the big leagues, and it all culminates. There's a new robot in town called Zeus.
Dan: Zeus. He's massive.
Sidey: And that's a, that's another fucking rocky reference because it's the Zeus is the son of Apollo, so Zeus is, has been created in program by called Tech Tech Machito.
And there's also some Flossie with him who's super hot and basically runs. The whole league. I don't really know what they're trying to say about this. That money's the fucking rule. I don't know. Fucking nonsense. Anyway, they have another fight. They, they gave some underground thing with this really bad, they're supposed to be like punks slash crims.
We know that because the guy's got Mohawk. So it's his first fight and they just say that your like, robot, your boss is shy. If you can last a minute with. , then you'll get a thousand. So Hugh Jackman and his irritating child say, okay, well we've basically got fucking no chance, but what, what choice do we have?
So they do it and they do last, it's getting pummeled into oblivion, but they do last the minute. And the guy comes out and he is like, here's your thousands. And the kid just says, fucking double or quits. So they do that and they fuck it. The Pete.
Dan: And for once though, hug huge Chapman. He's like, no, we should get out. We should get, he's the double down king.
Sidey: only time in the film.
Dan: And so just to show what a loser he
Pete: I'm, I'm gonna guess what happens.
Dan: He wins,
No, I told you he didn't guess
Sidey: they win this fight.
They do a, a jump move where he, he jumps up and, and does an uppercut at the same time and he he knocks the robot in a way that.
Like corrupts his programming. So he just starts whack, he's got a sledgehammer instead of a fist, and he just starts whacking himself anyway. He loses they get some money and get out there. Cause it's pretty sketchy. The guy has got a mohawk after all. So they do run out, then they get invited. Someone someone's seen them as like, Let's get you back into the, you can have a, you can fight in the league.
Dan: Yeah, yeah. All chat has gone about, cuz there's these podcasts and there's radio chat about a new kid on the block, you know, like we're being football. When you go, oh, you know, in the, in the Brazilian league, there's a new guy coming in or the, you know,
Sidey: because of it is because of the father son dynamic and the fact that they've bonded over the love of violence and money and they, they'd kind of dance before each
Dan: and, and be being a shadow boxer then, and Hugh Chapman as a boxer, right? Then what he's done is asked him to shadow and teach the robots some moves because he'll be able to, to copy him. So that's what Hugh Chapman does and that's why the girl fell in love with me as well, because he was such a
Pete: good, understandably so.
Sidey: So not only now though, we get, we get the shots of them reacting to the fight This one's now, at this point, it's still controlled with a, with a controller pad. Okay. But after this fight, the kid does some work on him and he, he assimilates noisy boy's voice activated thing into this machine. Yes. Bullshit. So he's now a voice activated robot. With the capacity to also do the shadow feature that might play out later.
Who knows? I mean, we just dunno at this point. But we now, so we get the shots when they fight of them two asking about and wagging controller and shouting and Hugh Atman, like constantly narrating everything that happens on screen. It's so fucking irritating. But we also get.
Evangeline Linny. Her Charact is called Bailey.
We, we keep seeing her in different bars and she's watching it on the tele. So we get to see her shouting at stuff at the tv, watching the fight. Oh, okay. So it's just endless. So out of a fight, 75% of it is just reaction shots of people. So
Pete: this, this is presumably they didn't have the budget to be able to show enough of the action
Dan: had loads of, they had loads. So they
Pete: that by kind of like talking you through narrating the action that you can't
Dan: Well, clever. You know, if you're gonna, I thought the way they connected the plot, in real Steel was quite riveting. Oh
Sidey: They have a league fight against something, or rather a robot thing. Oh, it's two, two heads, isn't it? Yeah, that's right. It's, it's the one with two heads. Two heads are better than.
well, they, they beat that one.
Pete: so not in this
Dan: And yeah. So this is all, all getting,
Sidey: but this is, this is in a proper arena with a big crowd.
Pete: Well, they're
Sidey: the, like basically the, the guy, not the guy, but sort of like the guy who says, let's get ready to rumble, like a mic comes
Pete: okay. Yeah, yeah,
Sidey: So when they win the child, and I would've shot him, if I could have done, he grabs the mic and just screams literally to the. , like where it's, it's like the audio's distorted.
It's so bad. And he calls out actually no. Before that, they've had an offer. The tahi and the woman have offered them 200
Who owns Zeus? They're the, they're the top people that own Zeus. And they're scared.
Sidey: for no
Dan: are scared.
Sidey: absolutely no reason in particular, they're worried about his robot who's just
Dan: like I did think, I did think they were gonna cut to a some point where this, this robot that was found in the, in the dump, yeah.
Had actually beaten him before, or there was some kind of earlier story, or there was, or there was some kind of secret metal they only used on this one that meant it was in this and they knew about it, but there was, there was none of that. It was just like for no reason. They were kind of
Pete: because I, I'm guessing that in this world where there's like all of this money and, and all of the, all of this like backing and promotion and everything that there's, there's a lot of these bots out there. Yeah. Yeah. Nice. But this one in particular seems to be
Sidey: no reason.
Dan: And, and the kid is now doing a
Sidey: well. She said, I'll give you behind him, we'll give you 200 grand for your robot. And Wow. Hugh Jackman was like, take it, we'll take it. We'll take it. And the kid's like, no fucking way. Not for Sarah. We won't take it. So anyway, after they win this fight, he calls them out and says, we wanna fucking fight Zeus
Dan: Calls him out. Calls him out. He goes, you, that offered me 200 grand.
How about you just offer me a fight? Come on, let's, come on Abbie. It's like a prop Delia
Sidey: screams it at the top of his
Pete: what we're dealing, what we're dealing with here is like some, the equivalent of like some total bums finding a shitty old tennis racket at, at like a, at the dump.
Yeah. And then winning like by accident and then, and then calling out Federer. Like within a week or so. Exactly. It sounds, seems plausible.
Dan: Yeah. And, and so it's not gonna happen anyway.
Sidey: but it goes viral, Pete. It goes the, the request, it goes viral. It's
Dan: because we got internet these days.
Sidey: And they have to basically have, they can't dodge it. because this guy's a chump. You know, why wouldn't you take the fight?
Blah, blah, blah. So they take the fight. We get a little, I don't even think there's a montage, just a, a
Pete: you've gotta have a
Dan: montage. There's, it's over six rounds. I never understood that. Cuz they are robots. They could last much longer. , but they,
Pete: is true. They don't need to go back to their corner
Dan: No, no. But they do,
Sidey: It's like when they, when they do a low blow, the whole crowd goes, Ooh, you're like, it's a robot It doesn't matter
Dan: you, but and,
Sidey: And at one point, hug Chapman, cuz the robot like kicks a leg part which like breaks and they're like, Ooh. It's like there's no rules while we're in the, in the like minor leagues. Like, it doesn't matter.
It's fucking robot. And so they, they, they do have a
Dan: you've watched Rumble in the Jungle, cuz that's the kind of vibes we've got now as As, what, what's his name? Adam. He's just taken serious pun. He's taken serious
Sidey: punishment, but he gets, he gets put out
Dan: doing the old Robo Dope though, because he's waiting for Zeus's energy to go right down.
He's only waiting for, you know, I was looking around saying for Don King, but he wasn't there. And then sure enough, Hugh Jackman's just waiting and waiting and waiting. Everybody's saying Attack, attack,
Sidey: importantly, but other fight. Very outset of the fight. Like he gets knocked down within a second, he's down, and then everyone's like, oh, gets up, knocked down again.
So he gets knocked down like four or five times before he, then he is like, Doing the, the Roper dope. But then later on, and I didn't know if this was gonna play, but it did, the, the controls fucked. His programming is fucked or whatever.
Dan: right. He's gotta go foreshadow
Sidey: he can't hear, he can't hear the voice activate.
Pete: now he's, he's on his own
Dan: needs to see what he's doing so he can copy the punches. So it's like Hugh Jackman himself is taking
Pete: Hugh is like stood up in full view now the
Sidey: kid's shouting hit him. He is like, no, no, not yet. And he is just like, the ropes getting pummeled. And you're like, oh my god. And now he's like, at one point he's like, okay, now cuz we see his power meter hilariously drop into the red.
And so he gives him a bit of a beating. And then he sort of, oh, he gets saved by the bell. No. Next round, exactly the same thing. Just fucking does the same thing. And gives him an absolute pummeling. And then the bell goes, and, and I, I don't know, you surely you were thinking the same. You're like, oh, he's still lost cuz he got knocked down so many fucking times at the start.
Like, it goes to the cards like 76, 70. 75,
Pete: Oh, this is tense
Sidey: and still world champion. You're like, yeah, okay, brilliant. But he's the moral victor because he was the underdog. He'd survived the fight, blah, blah,
Dan: They never said he would, Pete, they never said he would survive. I mean, I dunno if we ironed out all the details there, but it
Sidey: The kid is like jumping on the ropes, like screaming at the crowd and fucking
Dan: there's a real steal too.
That's your next question. Yes, there is.
Pete: they've lost, they've lost the money.
Sidey: I don't know if there was
Dan: there were loads of sponsorship. P everybody wants him. They stood up as Zeus. Zeus has tore everybody apart in one inside round.
Dan: okay. Inside round p I mean,
Sidey: like the old Tyson, and there's been a few moments about the film.
We haven't even said his name. Charlie Kenton is his name. That's Hugh Jackman's character. He's been trying to rekindle some sort of romance with Bailey
Sidey: Yeah. And he's tried to kiss her and she's kind of bated him away because he is like reprehensible fucking character . But because they lose this fight as well, she, they kiss and they're like, oh, it's amazing cuz you know, you've shown
Pete: so he gets the
Sidey: no redemptive arc
Dan: she watches him just like shadow boxing next to it. And then imagine
Pete: he looks pretty good doing
Dan: and he looks pretty good doing that. I think he has his shirt off once or twice in
Sidey: got the biceps out.
Dan: And and there it was Pete, you
Pete: and that's
Dan: a Christmas cracker or did you think it smelt?
Pete: Well, so I'm, what I'm getting, what I'm getting like to, to my right side, I am getting. Some not massive, like not a massive fan vibes. And
Dan: I was in tears at the end.
I, it was late at night. I'd had a few to drink. , I'll say that. But the it. There's no amo, there's no character arc from Hugh Jackman. Not at all.
And the little kid is terrible. And the story is ridiculous. You're
Pete: this up now,
Dan: but still I, it was just like a guilty pleasure. It was really easy to watch and just
Dan: you, you know, had that kind of inspiring motivating story without, we're getting everything wrong. Why it should be as well, it shouldn't be.
Sidey: you know, I would rather be guilty of genocide than guilty of taking pleasure from this.
Pete: What I would say side is there were parts when you were describing what was going on, where you were getting really like, quite into
Dan: the, he was well
Pete: part and there was a smile on your face, and I think that you derived some sort of pleasure from this.
Sidey: No, it was dreadful. I only put it on because I was watching the football and that was going badly.
I said, oh, I watched the movie. What? And then it was really dragging. . It really took taking a while to get going and then it, like the child got involved. Cause it wasn't obvious at the start that there was gonna be like a father son dynamic. It just looked like a stupid robot film. Yeah. Which I was gonna be into.
And I, so I paused it and that was it. And I really, it was over two hours long. This piece of shit. I mean, it's fucking way too long. Way too long.
Pete: Well, it, it sounds absolutely
Dan: What, what, what did the people say? Have we got metrics
Sidey: for, we have got metrics for it. Yeah. Seven. It's clocking at seven on IMD
Pete: out of
This, it sounds like a piece of shit.
Sidey: It, it is really bad.
Dan: That's a good score.
Sidey: 4.7 out of five on Amazon. 83% of positive vibes on Google. So
Dan: Jackman goes a long way. People like stuff
Sidey: He got 9 million for doing this. There was some bullshit where.
Dan: well, Ozzie dollars
Sidey: when he was first sent the script?
Hugh Jackman read it to his son Oscar at bed as a bedtime story. Oscar was so captivated by the story of Real Steele that Jackman knew he had to take the part. Yeah, that and the 9 million probably sweetened the deal a little bit. The budget for it was 110. It does look like pretty good,
Dan: 110 mil. Yeah. What it bloody deal. It does look good,
Sidey: build it cuz.
They did build real robots and then they would've had all the CGI stuff as well. So, and this like St. Hugh Jackman's, a big star Evangelina
Dan: yeah, yeah. Some 9 million for just his wage I guess.
Sidey: And it took 300, Mel, the box office. So I was fucking staggered.
But then I did, I did read that there was a real steel too in the offing. So it must have done all right to get
Dan: there is out. Yeah. I saw that. I haven't seen the film there.
Sidey: there's millions of people who like, Transformers. So if you like Transformers, he'd probably be okay with this as well. But honestly, I would've preferred it.
Rigs will be spinning in his grave if he were dead. But I would prefer this if Michael Bay had done it, cuz it was just, it wasn't big enough for the, like, ludicrousness
Pete: right. That, so a lot of these things, as preposterous as they sound,
Sidey: it needed to be more preposterous.
Pete: they have to Absolutely. Not just lean into it, but Absolutely.
Fucking Chuck themselves. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And, and had that happened than you might have got more of a kick out
Dan: I mean, o other people might might felt it, it did a bit more of that. It wasn't a perfect film, but will it entertain, will it entertain you for a couple of hours?
I think it
Pete: more than doubled.
Its its budget like, yeah. I don't think I'll ever watch it. Am I missing out though, Dan?
Dan: Well, I, I think you, you know, you could work, watch worse
if you're looking for a robot action
Pete: Well, the, my final question to you then side is you hated this. Where in your, does it enter like your top, like things we've seen on
Sidey: I think it might be, it might be in the top five. Worst things I've seen in for the pod.
Pete: Wow. Not number one. Still slamming salmon up
Sidey: Slam and salmon and then cats and then it's,
Pete: I quite
Dan: there must be 25 things in that top,
Sidey: then. Then bright. Then bright and rock, then something, something, something something.
I dunno, but it's, it was a attacker. I didn't like that either.
Pete: Yeah, but that's, that's now dropped out of the top five is what I'm getting to. I
Sidey: But I didn't, I didn't enjoy this at all. I really didn't enjoy it.
Pete: Well, it sounds wank.