No Time To Die & James Bond Jnr

No Time To Die

Reegs: Welcome to Bond Dad's Film Review. The podcast where fatherhood held our film loving souls hostage for a while, but now we've returned with a vengeance and a bad back to take a look at the movies we missed over the years.

This week sees us celebrating the world's most famous spy in a special Bond themed episode which starts with a look at the top five Bond gadgets and vehicles from the classic Aston Martin DB5 that can do everything from shooting rockets and spraying oil and flying in the air to the rid Crocodile submarine that can blend in with the wildlife, infiltrate enemy bases, and somehow not get ripped apart by real crocodiles.

For our main feature, we'll be tackling Daniel Craig's final outing as the suave secret agent, with the 25th entry in the franchise in 2021's No Time to Die, before we finish things up by revisiting early 90s animated series James Bond Jr., in which apparently, and conveniently, Bond had a brother who had a son who inherited his uncle's name, skills, and gadgets.

A smart spin off or a dumb cash in, a tribute to the franchise or a mockery of it, let's find out. A quick warning for you, profanity will flow like the shaken not stirred martinis we'll be drinking throughout, and as for spoilers, well, let's just say they're a very real possibility. I, for instance, was spoiled by this movie.

Sidey who this week has perfected the art of arranging books based on a complex system that factors in the height, genre and emotional impact of their covers and you have a new podcast coming out on that subject that you're exploring. Don't you called being self indulgent?

Sidey: Yes.

Reegs: coming out, yeah.

Sidey: Look out for that.

Reegs: We also have Dan, and I'm not trying to say he's old, but he had a backstage pass to the Big Bang. There's Bad Dad Peter. Pete, you have so many children, you should get a medal. Or a trophy. Or a vasectomy. Peter loves cheese so much he decided to try and smell like one tonight, so thank you. Thank you.

And we have narcoleptic dreamboat Chris. The voice virtuoso, whose impersonation skills are unmatched. Chris, this week, could you give us your Helena Bonham Carter, please?

Cris: Yeah.

Sidey: He's absolutely uncanny. He should

Reegs: That is absolutely uncanny, isn't it?

Sidey: I don't think he's getting

Dan: I, I think he's getting better and better

Reegs: Every week, yeah. Yeah, well done, Chris. And finally there's me, Riggs. Hello.

Cris: hi. Hello.

Pete: Hello.

Reegs: So, Bond! That's pretty exciting. Are we allowed to start talking about Bond straight away? Has

Dan: duh.

Reegs: be

Pete: already ruined two of my entries for the top five in your intro.

Yeah. Yeah.

Reegs: Yeah, but people knew we were going to

Dan: What was top five? Cause I'm, I'm like Bond. I'm just winging it, you know? Yeah.

Pete: You're just going straight from the hip.

Dan: the That's it. Exactly.

Pete: Wow, that's, that's

Dan: I've watched a lot of Bond over the last week. Like if you're going to ask me what I've watched this week, I'd say I've watched a lot of

Reegs: Have you? In preparation for this week's... Is

Sidey: there a particular Bond that you favour?

Dan: Um. You know, I haven't watched, re watched the, the George, George Lazenberry one. Yeah, I know and it's got really high marks and it's it's something I, I don't remember well enough.

Sidey: and Majesty's Secret Service is

Dan: well, I, I will want to watch that.

But I watched one of the old Pierce Brosnan ones which, yeah, but for a time he was, He was Bond, you know, and that was

Reegs: that is true of

Dan: the time. The kind of Bond we all wanted to see.

Pete: never seen the um uh maybe I have seen I can't remember but the George Lazenby one.

Sidey: He gets hitched. I feel like he gets hitched to Diana. A rig

Pete: a oh yeah yeah that

Sidey: And they kill her

Pete: feel like as a kid, I I shunned it because it wasn't Bond. It was

Sidey: like by, and he's Australian.

Pete: Yeah, there is that but is it good?

Sidey: Yeah, it's really good. It is really good.

Pete: You might give it a try at some

Sidey: I think it's, does it racist? I can't, no. Not as, probably not as racist as the, some of the Sean and Cony ones, but

Reegs: as

Sidey: time. Yeah. Aren't they?

Reegs: son of the Sean Connery.

Sidey: well we'll get into

Dan: it's moved with the times. It's what was, you

Reegs: Bond

Dan: is pretty much mainstream as far as your action hero goes. Now he's... You know, he's a little more rough and ready, but he's very polite and he's got, you know, back. You look at the Sean Connery ones, though, how he speaks to women and things. It was more that time, like,

Pete: I think that was just Sean Connery, like he, he, yeah.

Dan: But, but Bosnan did the same. They seem to move with the culture anyway, Bonds. I don't

Pete: Which, where do you think they're going to take it next

Sidey: next, though? Well, who's your pick? Who's your pick for the next Bond?

Pete: know.

Cris: to be a transgender or something.

Dan: very woke.

Pete: this is the thing. I like, I've got this horrible feeling and we'll come into this, but there's a character in The most recent Bond film who is in fact 007 and they might just do a complete cop out and

Sidey: think they will. I

Reegs: I don't think they will, but it, it,

Sidey: but...

Reegs: I like the way they did it in this movie, but we'll get onto that. But yeah, we don't need to talk about that. But

Sidey: that. Yeah, we'll talk about that. I don't

Pete: Hardy and stuff like that.

I think it'll be someone slightly less famous. Maybe Dale Winters. The

Sidey: West Ham only. Dale

Cris: Jesus

Pete: favourite is

Sidey: I... Well, the bookie's favourite is... Jean Michel Jarre, or whatever his name is, who plays the chef in The Bear.

Dan: oxygen. Yeah. Henry Cave was up for.

Pete: he's too, almost too bond,

Sidey: I think. If he was touted

Pete: Idris s Elba was, was touted for a little bit. I, I wouldn't be against that. But then

Sidey: Not old old, but in, oh,

Dan: Well, you're

Sidey: no, I, I mean, when, when I say old as in they've just kind of this arc has been bold, has been with him getting older. So I think they've done that. I think this might be, I don't know, we don't know what they're going to do

Reegs: I'd be game for like, complete, not like a series, just one off shots. Let Nolan do one, his own thing, it doesn't have to have any continuity So you have like a much older Bond, or a young Bond, or whatever, a

Dan: Well, I think there might be an origin story Bond one, because they nodded on this a lot.

Sidey: I think, I like that, I like one shot that's like a Tarantino, you know, Samuel L. Jackson could be Q,

Dan: we

Pete: could be cute. But he can't be super, super young, because he's like, high up in the Navy, isn't he?

He's a commander

Sidey: he can't be super, super young because he's like high up in the Navy, isn't he? He's a commander in the Navy. So can't be like Admiral Baby from the Simpsons.

Pete: at some point, because

Sidey: Well, it's been a long, been a long while. We had not bond related, but we had a top five last week. Films with a narration. Do you want to hear some more nominations?

Reegs: Yeah, please.

Sidey: We covered off Darren Lethley's and he like completely besmirched his reputation by nominating a Rocky Horror Picture Show. Beaver. He mentioned the big short,

Reegs: Yeah.

Dan: yeah, I

Sidey: Cause there was, it was quite a complicated sort of financial

Dan: Yeah, but it was good, yeah,

Reegs: made me angry. That movie

Dan: in that though,

Pete: I've got, I've got a really tenuous link to the big short. So, the company that I work for with whom I've been away the last week, one of the guys who now sits on the board of our new owners worked for the main person in the big short. I don't know the characters, but yeah.

Dan: that is

Pete: So yeah, that is tenuous, but it came up

Reegs: Christian Bale's character there? is

Dan: Bale? Fucking hell,

Pete: Exactly, yeah. I'm basically Robin to his Batman.

Sidey: Nice. And Zombieland he wanted to put in and then Breachy was talking about Goodfellas, Big Lebowski, American Psycho and Glorious Bastards she also points out she hates when a film starts off with a narrator and then forgets about them.

Referencing Juno for that. And Yeah,

Reegs: it's cheap, isn't it?

Sidey: And then North, which was the Bruce Willis rabbit costume thing. Yeah. I've not seen that one. Yeah,

Reegs: yeah. I have, it's

Sidey: dreadful. Possibly the worst film of the 90s, which I strongly recommend. It was Rob Reiner movie. Yeah. Wow. And then we've got a nomination for this week, so we'll cover that off later.

Reegs: later. Nice.

Pete: I'd like to double down on Chris's shout of Conan the Barbarian.

Cris: Okay. Oh yeah, it's

Pete: the greatest film ever made.

Cris: ever, mate. You did say Pete's gonna enjoy

Sidey: yeah. So what are we putting in out of that lot to complete the... Donut. No.

Cris: did bail. Exactly, yeah, he'd never

Dan: A big shot.

Sidey: Yeah, Big Short is done.

Cris: yeah.

bye.

Dan: know Christian Bale. He

Pete: Bale.

Exactly, yeah. He'd never forgive me if it didn't go in, yeah.

Dan: What is it? Top 5?

Sidey: 5... Top 5

Cris: Top 5 knee and hip replacements.

Pete: Top 5? recollections.

Dan: I'll go last.

Pete: Until Riggs goes to go first and then you interrupt.

Sidey: Right, we're talking about top 5 Bond vehicles and gadgets. Fertile ground this.

Reegs: Yeah. who

Sidey: Who wants to go first Dan?

Dan: I don't know. Who wants to go first?

Reegs: first? I did have a specific reason for wanting to include well. And that is because in The Man with the Golden Gun, which is a Connery.

Pete: Yep. Is it?

Sidey: No, it's Roger. It's

Reegs: Roger. It's Roger. Yeah, no, it's Roger. He's got

Sidey: great start. Yeah.

Reegs: a prosthetic nipple

Sidey: Yes.

Reegs: that he uses to impersonate Scaramanga.

Sidey: Yeah, it's been nominated online as well.

Reegs: that. Oh, has

Sidey: Yeah. So, it's double, double

Reegs: Double whammy of the Scaramanga nipple.

Sidey: Yeah.

And we've also had for another body part, we've had Connery's wig has been mentioned as well. I don't know

Reegs: it a gadget?

Sidey: if that's

Cris: is a...

Sidey: more of a disguise.

Cris: a disguise,

Pete: yeah. Yeah. Well, that's, so, absolutely right. And we, we incorporate Scaramanga into the game that we play after these pod

Sidey: to talk about it, we should talk about his gun. The

Pete: gun itself, is,

Sidey: because it's a hell of a gadget, that

Pete: It is indeed.

It's comprised

Sidey: don't look it up.

Reegs: anything

Pete: No, I've got it, I've got it

Sidey: No, tell me without looking at it.

Pete: it's a cigarette lighter, A cigarette holder, Uh, a pen, And cufflinks.

Sidey: And what's it made out of? Not just for aesthetic reasons, it makes it easier to get through metal detection. It doesn't

Pete: yeah. Cause he's an assassin, isn't

Sidey: assassin, isn't

Dan: Yeah.

Pete: that's a super duper

Sidey: Lee. So I would, right, so Bond actors. Not just Bond, but it seems like, even though you could say they're fuckin fairly formulaic and cheesy, it's still like a calling card of people, like, fuckin top tier people that are in Bond

Pete: Yeah, I imagine for for a long time, maybe still because there'll be people that have been in the Daniel Craig ones who we're now going to start seeing a lot more of but but yeah, you think of the people?

I mean, Christopher Walken and I'm just going to go through all

Sidey: all the... And they tend to, like, the ones with better villains, they, yeah, they're the real good actors, and some of them are fairly forgettable, we'll get into it.

Pete: Yeah. Okay. What way around are we going?

Cris: Okay, no, no, it's okay.

I, I, it's just because I found it so, because they're all there that all the gadgets are, he's got the gun, he's got the watch, he's got the lighter, he's got the, you know, that kind of explodes or the pen that shoots or all. I don't know. They're all kind of just Everybody kind of knows them. So the only idea I've only got one and I have to say, I don't know if it's a gadget or a car, but I have to say it's the suits because all of them have impeccable taste in clothing.

Sidey: And you can see, whenever they have

Cris: And you can see whenever they have the back short where it's just the tailoring is all the way down, like lining and everything is really, really nice. I don't know if that counts.

Sidey: It goes with the period, Roger Moore's lot of double breasted suits his, like, ski attire was very, very cool.

Cris: But

Pete: Yes.

Cris: beachwear,

Dan: height of

Reegs: it's that where it's all very neon, right? Yeah, yeah,

Cris: that's not even when they're at the beach or even when they're skiing, it's just like, the most modern and high end that he's always presentable. And all of them, like Pierce Brosnan drives a tank through a bridge and a prison and everything, and his hair doesn't move. And so, and he still wears the suit and

Dan: gel gadget

Cris: so I would say the suit is, I think it's more of an accessory than a gadget.

Pete: Is that really wanky bit in one of the pierce brosnan one where he's under under the water in a boat and he adjusts his tie?

Sidey: Well Daniel Craig does it when he gets the digger to carve the back of the train and he jumps onto it and then he does

Cris: Yeah, so that's, that's the one I have that I thought none of you will have it because you're going to have all the explosives and all the

Pete: Hell yeah!

Cris: and because I also I don't drive so I couldn't care less about cars, especially ones that shoot.

Reegs: Well it didn't, aww, but I had the toy though, so that makes it a little

Cris: Yes, no, I get it. But that's what I mean. That's, am I allowed a personal opinion?

Sidey: yeah.

Reegs: don't

Pete: on here you're not,

Cris: All right, sorry then,

Dan: personal opinion? Yes, I don't want to hate you. Straight away, it's the, the mouse supply kind of little mini scuba pack. It's four minutes of air underneath, but on top of that, they give him when he's got to go under the underwater, they give him an underwater camera. it takes pictures underwater.

Sidey: do

Reegs: very sophisticated technology though. Back in

Dan: back then. Yeah, that was So some of the gadgets kind of fall a little bit short as we've caught up with you

Sidey: Well, but some of them

Dan: got an underwater

Sidey: are some that are ahead of their time and do end up becoming like the smartwatch stuff,

Dan: the underwater camera

Sidey: yeah thunder was my personal favorite bond

Dan: It's a really good

Sidey: It's great. Yeah. Okay. What about then from Russia with love? It's Connery. Good. And the attache briefcase.

Pete: Ah,

Reegs: What's in it?

Pete: Yeah.

Sidey: What's not in it, Riggs? More to the point.

Pete: a utility briefcase.

Sidey: Let's find out.

Reegs: like Mary Poppins bag, but like, with guns and shit.

Sidey: So it's one of those ones where he goes to Kew Branch and we're given the full explanation.

And back in those days... They would cut away to just a close up of Desmond Llewellyn's hand almost like a like

Reegs: So, in

Sidey: in it, it's got It's

Dan: 50 gold sos

Pete: It has, it's

Sidey: 40 rounds of ammunition, it's got a small throwing knife in a secret compartment, it's got his AR 7 sniper rifle with infrared telescopic sight, 50 gold sovereigns and a tear gas cartridge disguised as a tin of calcum.

talcum powder

Reegs: That

Dan: spring loaded throwing knife

Sidey: and it's got a mechanism that you put on the lock to make it safe or to make it armed and that's how he gets what's his face? Quint from Jaws. Yeah.

Dan: isn't it? The, the gadget that is one of the, yeah, that is one of the most kind of

Sidey: So there are, in the field, when, when Bond's in the field, yes, it'll be like his watch, or his pen, or his stuff, but when you get a tour of Q Branches, you're doing quite a lot of them.

You see all the wacky, like, mental

Reegs: my, one of my favourite parts of watching Bond when I was a kid Was that bit where they walk through and you get like the fucking bagpipes

Dan: the, the stuff in prototype

Reegs: gun bagpipes and like a door that flute like just flings round and crushes a dummy or like,

Pete: How it would, how it would often go, there'd be a cut, so like Bond would make reference to the fact that he's gonna go and see Q or someone was sending him to Q, but it would like cut to the lab and they'd normally be like, you'd see one of the things in prototype before Bond's even walked in.

It's like Desmond Llewellyn like fucking around with something. There's some absolute belters in there. Let's talk about them. yeah, yeah,

Reegs: yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, what's your favorite? The ghetto blaster in,

Sidey: rocket launcher. Yeah, yeah.

Reegs: the rocket launcher,

Pete: I like the, I like the tea tray that decapitates the dummy.

Reegs: Yeah. The umbrella is

Sidey: If it gets, if it gets wet, it closes and like harpoons people through the neck, yeah.

Handy.

Pete: don't want to forget that

Sidey: it's

Pete: not your

Dan: The pens

Reegs: Oh, the toothpaste. There's the toothpaste. Yeah. Tonite toothpaste. Yeah. And it, that's, it's like triggered by cigarette lighter or something. 'cause you got all, you know

Sidey: It's also Dalton. The best one.

Reegs: best, the best bond in your opinion. Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: Think the best one of those... Oh,

Reegs: Oh, the inflatable ski jacket in the world is not enough that protects him from an avalanche.

Sidey: Oh yeah, well that

Reegs: Just like his jacket just turns into a ball.

Pete: thing now.

Sidey: Yeah, that could have been something that came to fruition. The managing couch.

Pete: Ah, the attack sofa, yeah.

Sidey: Which one's that from? The Living Daylights?

Pete: the Living Daylights,

Sidey: Which is...

Pete: Which is Dalton. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And that

Sidey: completely pointless.

It can look

Pete: like the couch has got to be, like, you've got to move that

Dan: around.

There must be a button where you can

Sidey: it literally just... The heat,

Pete: the guy gets on it and then it kind of like collapses on itself and then like imprisons the person in the

Dan: But there must be like a, a spring. Yeah, it needs, it's still in, it's still in process. But I can see the benefits of it because I could sit on it anytime I wanted.

But you're about to sit on it and I just make it a man eater. And I laugh every time.

Sidey: Oh,

Pete: Well, moving away from the Dalton content, I've got an amazing scene where there's a triple threat of Bond gadgets, right?

And it's the kind of, like, it's the, not the very final scene, but the end scene of Live and Let Die, which is an absolutely brilliant film with Rodge, his first. And he's yeah, it's the big showdown with Kananga, who is

Sidey: Dead.

Pete: Jeff Koto, the guy from Alien. He's also Mr. Big in some really bad prosthetics and stuff earlier on in the film.

But there's a point where Jane Seymour and Rodge are, like, strung up. Over a, a tank of sharks, like absolute

Reegs: frickin laser

Pete: with freaking laser beams. And what he does is he, so he's, they're both tied up with rope. So he uses, first of all, he uses the magnet on his watch to attract another Bond gadget, which is the the, the gas pellets.

Sidey: Yeah. that's

Pete: So that sticks to his watch. Then he uses the buzzsaw that's on his watch. It's a, it's a Rolex Submariner. Cuts the ropes with his with his watch drops to the ground, has a little scuffle, gets in the water sticks one of the pellets into tang's

Sidey: dog,

Reegs: mouth,

Pete: then there's a really horribly bad bit of like practical effects where he blows up like a balloon tube to the ceiling and explodes and Roger's line after that, uh, he always did.

I have an over inflated opinion of

Reegs: Oh, dearie

Pete: but. That watch, earlier in the film, he also uses the magnet to undo a lady's dress, like with the zip. Yeah, that

Dan: Classic

Reegs: he sexually assaulted her.

What about Goldfinger's one that you're always prattling on about, isn't it?

Who's that got in it.

Sidey: Well. Goldfinger's Goldfinger. Gert Frober plays him. That's

Reegs: That's Connery, isn't it?

Sidey: That's Connery, yeah.

Reegs: And he ends up with a... What I didn't know about... He ends up with a seagull on his head.

Sidey: Well, at the start he has a duck on his head. It's a duck.

Reegs: seagull. it a

Pete: Yeah, you're thinking of Blackadder, a small painted wooden duck, but

Sidey: it again because I watched it the other day and I'm sure it was a

Pete: It's in the opening credits, before, it's pre credits,

Reegs: But what I never realised is, is the duck just providing cover or is it also like part of a breathing

Pete: be his breathing apparatus as well, but it's definitely part of his scuba ensemble.

Sidey: into one of those gas, things, which is actually someone's gaffe. It's really unclear what's going on and he blows it up, but he sets the detonator for when he's like, turns up to the bar and his tuxedo and the explosion goes on.

It's fucking cool. But that one, like you mentioned, if you want to talk more about the vehicles, that's the one that not the first appearance, but it has the db5, which has been a With the guns behind

Reegs: It has the

Sidey: of this. I had a

Pete: had a toilet. Yeah.

Reegs: the

Sidey: had the rotating number plate. It had the shield.

It had smoke at the back. It had oil, I think. And machine guns at the front.

Pete: I know it's

Sidey: Classic. Yeah. And then it's been in God knows how many. I think all of the Daniel Craig ones. Maybe not Casino Royale.

Reegs: It wasn't in Casino

Sidey: Royale. That was Aston Martin. The Vanquish,

Pete: No, he, he he, he, I think it makes the comeback in Skyfall. I don't think it's in Quantum of Solace. Is it in Quantum of Solace? It's not in Casino Royale or Quantum of Solace, but then it's in the, the, the remainder.

Dan: I've...

Sidey: It's a lovely looking motor. I mean, I'm not particularly a car guy, but that is nice.

Pete: It is,

Dan: Can you ever remember this one? The bagpipe flamethrower. Machine gun.

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah, I think

Pete: Side, would you, would you rather be torched to death with a flamethrower or listen to bagpipe music?

Sidey: Torched to death, for sure.

Pete: yeah. I think there's a machine gun in one of the pipes and a flamethrower in the other. It's amazing!

Because the guy comes in playing the pipes first and then... I

Reegs: a very specific set of circumstances though in which bagpipes are the best medium for killing someone,

Sidey: a wedding, perhaps.

Reegs: Yeah, but a wedding in Scotland? Well, I suppose it's trendy these days, is it? To have bagpipes? You're, you're cool.

Sidey: cool. I have been at a wedding in England that had bagpipes. The groom was Scottish.

Pete: What are

Sidey: are we talking, motors or

Pete: talking, motors or gadgets? I think some of the car, the cars, I've got some cars and vehicles in here, but some of the cars featured in the cars episodes and stuff like that, whereas this gadgets one I think is, is, is

Reegs: mostly not cars. I've

Pete: gone mostly not cars, but with some cars as well, but in terms of gadgets we've got from Russia with love the knife shoe.

Sidey: that's her.

Pete: that's her with the, yeah, she's like a Specter double agent or whatever.

Sidey: spectre. Yeah, but

Pete: yeah. Yeah. But she's like frantically trying to boot people in the shins with their like pointy knife

Sidey: her like, pointy knife

Pete: Absolutely. Yeah. Any

Reegs: Advances on that. What are we going for? Other modes of transport?

Pete: whatever.

Reegs: well, I think Bond is a little bit, I haven't got the proper model, or have I? But you think of him with snowmobiles.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: But I... Somewhere in here, I've got what movie that was, Die Another Day.

Oh, in fact, he used the Bombardier Ski Doo MXZ Rev 800.

Dan: 800.

Reegs: Yeah, do you remember it? Yeah.

Dan: A lot of

Pete: A lot of those had to be sent back because they were faulty, but I think the 900 improved a lot of the

Reegs: Definitely, definitely. And then he had a I went

Dan: I went 2200p, I

Pete: Ooh. Um,

Dan: Smartblood, that was in

Sidey: yeah. this one.

Pete: talk about it.

Dan: latest one.

Are we not, are we holding back on,

Sidey: You can do.

Dan: on, this one? But I just think

Reegs: a gadget though,

Dan: it's absolutely a, a high tech gadget.

Pete: Well, it's it's kind of where the Daniel Craig stuff went, wasn't

Dan: Yeah, and I think it's probably one of those next gadgets that will people, you know be looking into and how you can manipulate

Pete: was in the like, yeah, Craig was like a new dawn of bond and these were like a new dawn of gadget, smart Blood's actually in Specter and in a few of the Daniel Craig ones as well.

Dan: mentioned yeah, it was

Sidey: but vehicles, I mean, you do kind of associate Bond with being swanky in his suits and when the Aston Martins but he also has a fair run of really wank cars. To like, send it up, so For Your Eyes Only has the 2CV The chase down the hill where they outrun all the fucking idiots one of the films bear with me Octopussy, he's in a tuk tuk

Reegs: Yeah.

Pete: And,

Sidey: That's really,

Pete: and in a

Sidey: really wank, that film

Reegs: Actually, made by Bajaj Auto Ltd. The world's largest manufacturer of auto rickshaws. Don't

Sidey: Yeah, and of course we've got Wet Nelly, which is the Lotus Esprit S1.

Pete: Yeah.

Sidey: But there's another Nelly, it's the the other one is Little Nelly, which is from You Only Live Twice. That's the gyroplane. It's a Wallace WA116.

Reegs: That's yeah.

Sidey: That's what, and they build it in a kind of like stop motion thing.

Like, it just happens really quickly. But it looks like it'd be pretty fun to fly around in.

Pete: it'd be pretty to fly around in.

Sidey: flops off. Oh yeah, yeah.

Reegs: And I don't think we've mentioned the Lotus, have we? I might

Sidey: I mentioned it as Wet Nelly does the intro to Little Nelly.

Yeah,

Reegs: Nelly. I got lost with all the

Pete: also, I can't remember what type of car it was, another one I just remember, Vietor Akil, his car, I mean, this would not be, it's a Renault, it gets cut in half and he's still driving it around.

Sidey: It's a Renault 11. It's a

Pete: of Mayday.

Sidey: Yeah, it's a Renault 11, chasing around the streets of Paris in that,

Pete: That, would that, is that, like,

Sidey: Well, it would have to be,

Dan: be

Sidey: it would have to be front wheel drive. Yeah.

Dan: What's the car he's got on Casino Royale?

Sidey: I think it's like a Aston Martin

Dan: Yeah, I think it is.

Aston Martin and he's just been poisoned and he's got to get to the car

Sidey: It's got, it's got gadgets. It's got the defibrillator. Yeah.

Dan: it's got a little mini defib in

Pete: Yeah, quite a useful gadget that. Saves, saves his life.

Sidey: That's quite a lot. Should we go to the I've

Reegs: I've

Pete: got one more just because I think it's, it gives a backstory to an injury that, that is quite famous, and that's in Spectre he's got his watch that lets off like an electrode, so you know he's getting tortured with those horrible little, like, drills and stuff, so he sets the watch, or his, his bird sets the watch, and then flings it, and then that blows up, and that's what gives Blofeld his scar,

Sidey: Yeah

Pete: of the, of the scar.

I thought it was quite

Sidey: That is good. You know, number one nominator, Darren Leathley coming hot with the Lotus Spree. He says he had the toy of that, which could have been a hand me down from his cousin. And he was born in the year that Spy Who Loved Me was released. So he's a big fan of that. Wikipedia tells him that the car was actually purchased by Global Village Idiot Elon

Reegs: Oh.

Sidey: And it was Darren Leathley who also nominated the fake third nipple. A ridiculous yet entirely legitimate plot device.

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: Yeah,

Dan: one you'd

Reegs: We're all united by that nipple.

Sidey: Yeah. Beaver the Toyota Land Cruiser in No Time to Die, and Gadgets does the seagull on Sean Connery's head count as camouflage.

Pete: seagull

Sidey: I'm sure it was a duck. Anyhow, anyhow. Right, Reegs, what are you putting

Reegs: I'm putting in the crocodile submarine.

Sidey: that's a hell of a shout.

Pete: I'm going for one I haven't mentioned yet, which is In A View To A Kill, Roger, obviously, is the best Bond. He gets given some x ray sunglasses that he's told he can use to scan for, like, people with weapons, and he uses it to look at, basically, like, ladies bits instead.

Which is why I love Rog so much in the, as Bond.

Reegs: Yeah. do it. So creep creepy. Roger.

Pete: Yeah, you're telling me you wouldn't?

Reegs: we? Well, it's a bit of an ethical,

Pete: okay. You just watched porn instead. Yeah.

Sidey: Chris, you put in suits? Nice.

Dan: Suits you. I'm going to go for the watch that you mentioned because it is one of the First bonds, if not the first bond, I remember watching and it just, that watch was fantastic lasers and magnets and, and all sorts. Brilliant. So I'm going to put in his Rolex Submariner.

Sidey: me. Oh, a mannequin couch for me.

Reegs: Nice.

Pete: ha.

Sidey: Yeah, and then we'll, we'll finish the rest off next week.

have got a tremendous selection of tonight. I bits and bobs.

Dan: Yeah.

Sidey: I think I bought some mint flavored reindeer,

Pete: you Snowballs. Woah, woah, woah, hang on,

Dan: finished most

Cris: I've, I've had the

Sidey: some minstrels,

Reegs: Is there one left of those? Because I wanted to keep an eye on that.

Pete: that. I didn't get any of those.

Dan: one left and I've only had three.

Reegs: had three. Oh, Pete, I'll wrestle you for it.

Dan: Here look, I'm going to throw it up in the middle and we'll

Pete: in the middle. I'll sword,

Reegs: I've got a gammy

Dan: That was a really fair throw though.

Sidey: then, Pete, you bought... All of your kids sweets

Reegs: Yeah.

Pete: Do you know what it is? It's, it's, my missus has actually got a ridiculous sweet tooth. She buys sweets, sweets, sweets all the time. Says it's for the kids. It's mainly for her. And then she like, doesn't let the kids ever have them. Like one sweet a year kind of thing. They're mainly for her and I I basically stole a massive bag full.

Sidey: It is a massive bag, you're right.

Pete: but there's some real goodies in

Reegs: We put a serious dent in

Dan: less massive now, yeah. As

Sidey: And, we've got last week's cheese left over. The cheese, the enthusiasm for cheese I feel is on the wane just at the moment.

Dan: it? How

Sidey: I think we're, well we've got to build ourselves back up for the Christmas cheeses.

Dan: again, if you, if you do have about 30 that'll put you off

Pete: I feel, like, so, I'm basically going to have to cancel the subscription,

Sidey: because if I

Pete: don't, and then I just get the cheese, I will die really soon, because I'll eat it all, and my cholesterol's already off the

Sidey: charts.

I was out last Wednesday for, for a pizza with some of my old work colleagues, one of whom's got a terminal brain tumour. And he said, what are you having to eat? And I said, I'm having this Contadina pizza with... Like I put parma ham on the top and then I said, it's like, what is it? So it's like a four cheese one, you know, it's got blue cheese on it and all that.

I said, it's like gout on a plate and that's like, but I won't bother you really, really.

Pete: we didn't talk film. memorably

Sidey: that happened. But we are going to talk about film that I memorably spoiled. Like in 2021, when, when this came out, cause I saw it at the cinema.

Reegs: Yeah. Also, what's been great about this is that the Bond movies have been free on Amazon Prime for about two years, all of them including this movie up until this week when we nominated it and it's gone. I had to rent this on Apple tv.

Pete: There is no time to die, but this

Sidey: If you didn't know that Bond was

Reegs: If you didn't know that Bond was going to die, the movie tells you over and over and over and over and over again that he's going to die via foreshadowing. So,

Dan: and Sidey told us a

Reegs: And Sidey told us. like a few days after its release, I think. Thanks for that.

Sidey: I enjoyed

Pete: I enjoyed that. So,

Sidey: So in we've sort of spoken about this on the pod about how these particular run of movies are a continuous narrative thread across them. Yeah. I think one of the reasons why, like the Pierce Brosnan ones are so shit. Not just because it's in the 90s, but it's like wishy washy villains.

There's no specter overarching like sinister plot. It's just one crazy guy. Another crazy guy.

Reegs: Well, over the Craig franchise, they've tried to sort of analyze the character in various ways and show him in various stages of his life and his relevance to the, the world and that sort of thing.

So it's been a bit more interesting than those

Dan: you think they knew that from the start?

Do you think their conversations they had with him from the beginning say, look, we want to do four or five

Sidey: Well, I think he wanted to, he, they had to drag him back, kicking and screaming and via a truckload of money to do this one. So I think he was kind of done. They could have ended it after the Blofeld one. Right. Spectre. Spectre,

Pete: Spector. yeah. But I think that they did go out with that, because we'd we'd spoken about this before, about how I mean, if you look at, like, the, the, what you get from the, the Brosnan ones versus what you get from the Craig ones, it's absolute night and day, like, as you said, the Brosnan ones were all, like, cow shit, and these ones, I mean, some more than others, definitely, but it's, it's some of the best Bond,

Dan: Well, I watched Quantum of Solace,

Pete: But there's some still brilliant stuff in there, it's definitely not the best Daniel Craig one,

Sidey: re watched it and it's good.

Dan: No real villain.

Pete: yOu've got the guy that's stealing all the water and that, yeah, it's a bit flimsy and stuff and it doesn't really progress the whole kind of spectre plot, but

Sidey: This one, we had all the promotional stuff for this one, and we were shown Safin was the villain in this one.

Or, one

Reegs: and we knew it was Craig's last outing Merits

Pete: Safin, the

Sidey: Yeah. and

Cris: and his sister.

Sidey: and it

Reegs: it had a load of extra baggage around it because it was the 25th entry in the franchise. And a lot of calls to pay homage to things that have happened in, the

Pete: Oh, can I just say, this is hands down one of the, straight in the top three or Of worst Bond themes.

It's a fucking, completely like, totally forgettable, bollocks song. Theme. Right. When you can stack it up against some of the others.

Sidey: What?

You're like, starting an argument with no one.

Pete: I, no, I feel so

Sidey: one, no one came in with a

Pete: no, no, no, I'm not, I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to undermine anyone else's point here. Which I normally do. This is just wank as a

Sidey: Well, I

Reegs: We also don't, we also don't get to the Bond theme until 23 minutes and

Sidey: has the record. Yeah. I would say that all of the Daniel Craig ones, as good as the films are, none of them have a particularly strong theme

Pete: of feature. I'm gonna, this will get a reaction, but I really like the Sam Smith one.

Spectre, it's a great one.

Reegs: Mm.

Pete: I

Sidey: Well, yeah.

Dan: who did

Pete: And we like Casino Royale

Cris: Adele. Adele.

Pete: sky was,

Sidey: probably the best one, I'd say. Just because she's

Pete: Sam. Smith one. He won the Oscar, actually, Sam Smith one.

Sidey: Fine. So, this one starts off and introduces us to Remy

Reegs: We get, it's a good joke, because the one I saw before was Casino Royale, so in this one, you get the traditional Bond opening, he walks on and shoots down the barrel of the, you know, you get that, which is like, a signal I guess that this is going to actually have quite a lot of the things that you're familiar

Dan: a milestone, isn't it? 25, a quarter of a hundred.

Reegs: So that was quite cool. Get it. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks. Maths man. Thank you.

Dan: Thank you

Pete: Anyway,

Reegs: and anyway, we dissolve from that into white and the sort of figure in the snow again, evocative of stuff you've seen in bond and he goes out to

Sidey: He's wearing a mask

Reegs: yeah. Do you see them all straight away?

You see the, you see the girl. It's clearly some time ago. Could they listening to CDs and that she's got Tamagotchi

Sidey: Yes, yeah, a nice bit of, scene setting I think to me it was obviously that they were French. I think it was obviously layers to do his character I think our mom's an alcoholic.

It seems

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: someone's

Reegs: any of this

Sidey: someone is approaching the gaff with a automatic

Pete: Oh, assault rifle,

Sidey: AR fifteen or something. I don't know exactly what it is, but um you know not the kind of ideal scenario for a young child and a drunk mother and she sees him coming tries to wake up the mom isn't able to. There's a panic room, I think.

Yeah, but it's not working.

Reegs: It's where she goes later to show Bond where the island stuff is

Sidey: Yeah, and he just shoots the door comes in. She hides upstairs and here's her mother getting executed which is always a treat.

Reegs: doesn't he say about, oh, your husband had my family backstory behind this guy.

Sidey: killed, so we know already the back story behind this guy?

He takes about six bullets, doesn't he? Yeah, yeah. Then

Reegs: He takes about six bullets, doesn't he, to the chest, and she, then she she drags him out to the

Sidey: to the house.

Reegs: cold. She sprints off across the ice, which then... It's well, this bit is like, totally like a horror movie, basically the, with the masked slasher coming up and yeah, he rises up like the undertaker and eventually she's trapped on the lake and falls under the ice and he's firing bullets into it. At first you're not sure where this is going to end but it ends with her being rescued by him pulled out onto the ice.

Pete: You see his mask kind of like shattered a bit and underneath like really like mottled skin

Sidey: you know

Pete: you know you're dealing with a baddie, almost like a zombie

Sidey: I think the fact that he executed his mum, I think, indicated

Reegs: Yeah, he was definitely a baddie for, yeah.

Sidey: but yeah, he basically, and it cuts to from her in the icy water to her in the tropical waters and

Reegs: They're in Italy, Matera, Italy. And it's, you know, it's lovely and the sun is shining and it's all nice. Bond's still got one eye over his shoulder or whatever the expression is, you know.

Sidey: Well, it's mostly she's

Reegs: it's mostly she's saying you can't, we can't move on in our relationship until you've got closure over what happened with Vesper. So, Which, you know, I can't remember the continuity from what happened in Spectre and all that shit. So I didn't really have a

Pete: all that,

Reegs: who these people were,

Pete: really have a lot of time to look

Reegs: I knew about Vesper, the big love of his life and what turned him from being a, you know, into a womanizer effectively, or a

Pete: a, you know, into a womaniser effectively? Yeah, he wakes up, gives her a kiss and

Sidey: Yeah, he wakes up gives her a kiss and says I'm gonna sort out that thing that we were talking about we'll be back shortly.

So he goes, she's, she's entombed in. This is, it's Greece, isn't it?

Reegs: It's Italy, Madeira.

Sidey: Yeah. Right. Anyway, so he goes to her like tomb. There's a little photo of her,

Reegs: a little inscription above it.

Sidey: Yeah. He, he investigates the flowers and there's a specter card. Boom.

Dan: Was she 23? I think she was born...

Reegs: 2006 was her death, I can't remember what

Sidey: it was. 83 to. I think she was born

Dan: born. Right,

Reegs: Yeah, there you go. So, go on, Maths Magician, you're the... off! I know,

Pete: ain't you?

Dan: it's, it's, yeah,

Pete: It comes easy to you.

Dan: go.

Pete: Nearly quarter of a

Dan: Nearly there.

Sidey: So it does blow up. He, he comes.

Reegs: well we get a shot of him motionless. So we

Sidey: his ears ringing and stuff, yeah, and then we get a

Dan: yeah, and then

Sidey: well, I think it

Dan: a good shot. Well, you did think,

Sidey: Well, you do think, like, you could just chuck a load more explosives just to make sure if that's what you want to do,

Dan: that that's where he's at.

Well,

Pete: Well, because he's so switched on. He sees the card and he, it doesn't just like blow up in his face, he makes a run for it.

Dan: got a

Pete: He gets, he gets 10 yards, a good 10 yards away and, and dies before the explosion happens.

Reegs: Yeah. So anyway. His

Pete: senses were tingling.

Reegs: He ends up, he, he tries to call Madeline, and he can't get through, so he rushes back to meet her.

Ends up on a, a pretty cool sequence on a, bridge with two vehicles driving at him. One kind of goes over him. He ducks down behind a stone and then he uses some electricity cabling

Dan: That was a good move.

Reegs: the bridge and then

Dan: Under the stone.

Reegs: run off. It's pretty cool. And then he gets in a hand to hand fight with a guy who gives him a crucial bit of plot information.

He says, as he's fighting with him, he says, she's a daughter of specter something like that. You don't know who you're dealing with so planting the seed of doubt in his mind so when he's dispatched him and ridden off on this motorcycle doing this fucking amazing jump over a the wall there it all filmed like with a drone shot and a great little bit of stunt work as he goes over the wall.

Cool. When he does go back to find Madeline he's pretty like

Dan: He's pretty

Sidey: pretty He pushes her as he's trying to fix...

Ionic

Pete: out.

Bionic eye, yeah. But I mean, obviously he's, he's... Trusted a lady in the past and fallen for her and she double crossed him. So he's,

Reegs: now it's happening again!

Pete: or he thinks it's happening again. So that's why he

Reegs: And it gets worse as they drive off, right? Because they get the DB5 straight into that, and he drives off to escape, and she's got a phone call from Blofeld! And he's like, Oh, your father would be proud and all sorts of stuff. So when he eventually gets sort of shut down in this courtyard with the bells tolling,

Sidey: For whom the bell tolls.

Reegs: him, the bell tolls exactly.

And he's sitting in the car baffled and she's screaming at him to do something.

Sidey: Because they're being machine guns. They're being

Reegs: machine gunned to oblivion.

Dan: Yeah. the car is taking as many hits you can for the first time just see a little bit of the glass

Sidey: guy's shooting just from one particular bit of the glass, trying to get through, isn't he? And he's taking his time, and it's building, and he eventually goes, okay. we'll do something and he gets the the headlight machine, but I think they're miniguns in this one spins the car around just fucking shoots

Dan: and just fucking shoots you. He did

Reegs: it. did look for a moment that he was on the verge of a complete

Sidey: breakdown But he

Reegs: That he was just going to allow them

Dan: going to allow them both to... I

Cris: it was more, I thought it was more for him to wait until she actually says that it was her.

Pete: Oh yeah, I didn't

Cris: That was my, that was my impression, that he just kind of keeps quiet until she actually... admits that she sent him to die or something like that rather

Reegs: obviously still doesn't trust her because he puts her in a

Sidey: kicks out.

And, and what happens immediately after, he obviously still doesn't trust her because he puts someone on a train. Yeah. And fucking turns his back like cold his eyes, and she's staring and crying at him, and he is just like, Nope.

Reegs: and he looks directly at the camera and says, you'll never see me

Sidey: Yeah.

And then he's gone. She disappears. So he obviously didn't trust her. The trust was gone. And that was

Reegs: that's when we get the credit.

Sidey: Yeah, it's 23, 24 minutes in. And it's something like... Some years have passed. Next

Reegs: Next we get It's a bio lab, isn't it? Is it Hugh Dennis? Is that his name?

Dan: yeah, it is. That's right, he's cracking some jokes.

Pete: Well, he's quite irritating as a person, as a comedian and everything, but I quite liked his character in this.

It

Sidey: He was also in the Mary Whitehouse

Reegs: Whitehouse

Pete: Yeah, but he

Sidey: But he was one of the two

Pete: yeah, yeah, it was,

Reegs: like him, he's alright.

Pete: alright. Nah, he's,

Sidey: alright. Nah, he's...

Reegs: yeah, there's some jokes about giving people smallpox and ebola, all

Dan: Mixed in with

Sidey: there's a foreign scientist, which has got to be a red flag, surely.

Reegs: He gets a call from a f someone who tells him to copy a load of shit and steal this, that and the other because Spectre are coming and as after that happens,

Dan: We realized he's his inside man. And yeah,

Reegs: There's a great, there's a cool action sequence.

We don't really need to talk about except the way he's extracted, which is using these light magnets that they throw down a sort of elevator shaft and then they use it to decelerate his approach is cool. I don't, I wanted to look up whether that was real or not

Sidey: It's definitely real. I still was on the screen. So yeah, therefore Yeah

Dan: I thought that actually would be a really. clever way to just get around

Reegs: they

Pete: stop having to use the stairs. yeah,

Reegs: When M hears about this, he wants to shut the story down absolutely immediately. He's like, don't tell the Prime Minister. Oh, you know, money, penny, blah, blah, blah. So, and then we cut to Bond living the high life out in Jamaica.

Sidey: In Goldeneye.

Dan: Yeah, he's gone back to his roots and he's just yeah.

Relaxing up there, isn't he?

Reegs: He's fishing and...

Dan: he's playing games with Scorpions. Is that this one?

Sidey: I told

Reegs: he comes back

Dan: you I watched a lot of bond this week.

Reegs: comes back from a fishing trip and he notices that actually somebody's broken into his place. There's left cigarette cigar ash all over the place. And of course it's going to turn out to be Felix. He's who wants to get the band back together for one last hurrah.

But he's accompanied by some douchebag called Logan who.

Sidey: Logan, Ash, that's a shit name.

Reegs: yeah, Bond immediately fingers lol as a as a, as a shit house. Yeah.

Pete: But

Reegs: so yeah, anyway, Felix catches Bond up on the plot of the movie cause he hasn't seen it, right? So he has to tell him about Obrejef and the, the stuff that was stolen, Heracles and all that.

Let's go and do it. We're going out to Cuba.

Sidey: Yeah, effectively he's working for the CIA now. It's not

Reegs: but Bond's like, no, I'm not that interested. But as he leaves, he's then his car breaks down. So he's like a, this gorgeous local comes along to pick him up on his bike and take him back to his house straight for sex. Basically. She says nice hours, but it sounds like nice ass.

And he says, thank you. Did you

Sidey: I think he knows, he knows from the get go that she's an agent.

Reegs: I don't think he knows until he goes into the bedroom and she takes the thing off her head, wig off, that's when he knows and because she's played him for a bit

Dan: Bond knows.

Reegs: I don't think so. Because the women get the upper hand in quite a lot of this stuff.

Anyway, she's, she's 007. She has come to ward him off, stay away from this. This is her case that she's working.

Sidey: he's been so off grid. Mm. They think he's died or at least never, ever coming back. So yeah, he's been replaced.

Reegs: How did you feel about her being 007?

Sidey: I just didn't think she's a very good actress. But fine with it. Plot-wise.

Pete: Yeah, I didn't mind it, plot wise.

Reegs: I really liked it. I, I, I kept thinking of the angry

Sidey: nerds. There was so many angry

Reegs: The angry people being so angry that she was black and female. Like,

Dan: I

Cris: didn't care about that.

I just thought that the interaction between them was... Way too, yeah, too cringy and she was way too friendly for just, just like that. Just, they met twice and then she kind of has him his back

Sidey: But when she offered the oh oh seven back to him, I thought it was really cringey.

I didn't like

Pete: cringy. Yeah, so all the way through the film there's this like, running joke about the fact that she's now 007 and he isn't.

Reegs: But it's interesting because they're talking about, is 007 Bond or are they two separate things? And what is

Dan: They're

Reegs: I know, but they're talking about it explicitly in the plot.

And then is it interesting, you know, is it significant that he's 007 or not? Like, you know, the, just the fact to have that

Pete: I'm not sure. I mean, I might, I might totally, I might... Be totally misunderstanding this, but I'm not certain that people of this level of, like, fucking ability are gonna give a flying fuck about, like, oh, my handle, oh, I had that

Reegs: I know, but it's paying homage to the iconography of it all within the within the movie, because there's a lot of that going on, right? I mean, I, you guys have seen all the other movies, but isn't there a trillion references to all the other movies littered throughout

Pete: the series? There's a lot, yeah,

Reegs: to be discussing the significance and iconography of 007 seems like.

yeah,

Pete: Yeah, I just, I thought that they overplayed that, it was a bit, they hammed it up a little bit.

Dan: But in this,

Pete: anyway.

Sidey: was getting annoyed by other things

Dan: yeah 007 was the, the black girl. Yeah. And he was, was he? Zero 14.

Reegs: They don't say, I don't think,

Dan: thought it is a

Pete: It was, because it's double, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Reegs: Oh, is it? Did they say that?

Yeah. Alright, okay.

Sidey: But they need to go, there's, there's going to be a meeting of... Spectre

Reegs: Yeah. Blofeld birthday.

Sidey: And they look at some footage of Blofeld in Belmarsh and he's bonkers just shouting like weird stream of consciousness nonsense at the camera and they're like, well, how is he able to, you know, coordinate all this?

It's like, he's obviously not, like they're just having a meeting.

Reegs: One thing I didn't get in the plot is, he's got his bionic eye at this point. So they've got him in this super secure prison and left a bionic eye in him. Is that right though? That's Yeah. Right, okay, right.

Pete: Well, he he's he's got the he can view what is being seen from the

Sidey: he's receiving from the bionic eye.

At the facility in Spectre, so he, he has no Wi Fi, so to then allow him to have

Reegs: The

Pete: bionic eye,

Reegs: Mm.

Sidey: I'm assuming, Wi Fi to pick

Reegs: up. Yeah.

Sidey: downloads seems like a security breach

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: lax. Anyway they, they think, so Bond has got to go and get this guy out and there's going to be another agent there to meet Bond, he's told.

But she's, like, a noob. But she can handle herself.

Pete: we talk about how hot she is?

Sidey: It's

Reegs: Anna Damas playing Paloma. It's a great character

Sidey: Hand picked by Daniel Craig off the back of Knives Out, because he thought she was great. And probably looked quite good as a bong girl.

Pete: never seen her in anything else. And she is, yeah, straight in top five Bond

Cris: Then you have to watch Manos de Piedra. It's a movie about Alberto Duran. And she is naked most of the movie.

Pete: Okay. I'm going to watch that now, in

Sidey: watch that

Reegs: She's, she's

Sidey: So she did only have three weeks. So the lines in the movie where she was really nervous that she wouldn't be able to cope with the action sequences and whatever.

When she's saying in the film, oh, I've only had three weeks training like that was like an in joke because lol She had

Reegs: an in joke, like metal.

Sidey: She does steal the whole fucking movie

Reegs: of

Sidey: She kicks ass and looks smoking fucking hot while she's doing it.

Reegs: it. Yeah, and there's a great, you know, there's a bit where there's, where he's getting undressed but there's no like sexual tension and they don't even talk about it and then she just comes out, kicks ass to the Latin music, she gets drunk really quickly and Bond's shown to be, in fact this is a sequence where the girls are just all over the place being brilliant and Bond's a bit of a sort of destructive macho drunkard almost getting through this fight because the girls Really

Pete: Yeah, yeah,

Reegs: don't they?

And he ends up taking Obruchev away. He throws the tea tray in to knock him over on the

Pete: this scene is important because it's the first time we see the effects of the,

Reegs: Oh yeah, we skipped over that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because

Pete: this is I don't think it necessarily explains it, but all of a

Reegs: baffling to

Pete: yeah, all of a sudden at this party, a load of people start, like, falling over, bleeding from the eyes and...

And, and so on. I've got, that's my key to shut up.

Reegs: No, you're alright. You're

Sidey: they do do that. They do, they I think he's told to upload the files or change the targets of whoever this virus Hercules so it can specifically target people based on their DNA. Yeah. And it takes out every from Specter. So the only person from Specter left is Blofeld. Hated this.

Reegs: they're all at the party, aren't they? They're all

Sidey: fucking hated this. Yeah. And so Bond, they'd have to then investigate, well first of all, he gives amo load of shit for running his own like black ops thing with a fucking, like, so fucking unbelievably dangerous. Yeah. Programmable buyer weapon, which is like against all kinds of conventions.

Reegs: Yeah. And over the next few minutes, we're going to find out that it can do stuff like target specific

Sidey: ethnicities. Ethnicities. Yeah.

Reegs: and, and individual traits and all sorts of shit when we get Q and all that law involved.

Sidey: So it's, so, it's like globally threatening blah. And they ask oh oh seven to go to Bell Marsh, but bond's gonna go and have a go as well.

And before we get there we, we are told that the only person who's had access to speak to Blofeld just so happens to

Dan: wouldn't you know it.

Sidey: Bons ex that he fucked off five years ago. And so they have this meeting in the corridor where he's he's talking to Tanner and Tanner's like, oh, how's you know? Are you gonna be all right?

And he's like, for God's sake, Tana. And as soon as he climbs around the corner, he's not okay. Like, but then he tries to play it confident, walks up her, and she just fucking blanks him. And he's obviously disarmed by it.

Reegs: did he know that, who she was gonna

Sidey: be? Yeah. Yeah, they'd have a conversation about it, but he's trying to put on a front and he's trying to build a bond about it,

Reegs: alright,

Sidey: as he sees

Reegs: it is a chink in his, right, we're supposed to understand it as a

Pete: chink in

Reegs: vulnerability at the

Sidey: But she's been told to put on this perfume

Reegs: well Rami Malek, Lucifer Satan,

Sidey: He goes to her office,

Reegs: to visit her, that is his name, isn't it, basically, he's stupid as shit, so he turns up about an hour and 20 minutes into the movie, like, oh, you know, remember me, I was here,

Sidey: doing an Alan Rickman impression. Yeah. Just talk really slowly. And when you get to the end of the sentence, leave a massive... Pause. He shows

Reegs: shows her his special box, which has got his mask in, and basically threatens her child that we don't know about yet

Sidey: Yes, this is

Reegs: kill Blofeld with these nanobots that he's smuggled in in a tiny dildo.

Sidey: Yeah, so she puts that on in the bathroom,

Dan: It's

Sidey: goes in with Bond, goes in with Bond to the cell, and Has a like panic attacky freak out, not gonna do it, and

Reegs: freak out, not being able to touch her. But they,

Sidey: It's eventually, I think it's the but they, her and Bond do touch, I think when she freaks out, he helps her

Dan: grabs her wrist,

Sidey: and then later, like during the interview, Blofeld just like has the upper hand, of course, and is too slimy and really has nothing to

Dan: needs throttling.

Sidey: but he has nothing, like Bond has no leverage over him at all, he's already in prison, like

Reegs: Oh. They have this sort of joke. Batman thing. We are not so different. You and I we're both in a prison, all that stuff. You know yours. 'cause he tells him.

He tells him, you know, I never, she wasn't. Part of the plot I just knew you were gonna go to Vesper's grave because it's like the most fucking obvious thing that you ever Would do so I just blew it up. So you've blown your whole life up for no reason sort of thing So he's finally he's got one over on him even in his death Cuz Bond gets well rally riled up by this

Sidey: this. He chokes,

Reegs: him a then kind of comes to gets his

Dan: well, he's carrying the nanobots on his

Reegs: Where Exactly.

Sidey: comes in and he's stopped throttling Rudy and they're having the you can't be, you know, throttling guests. Turns around and he's died. Yeah. And so all of a sudden everything they've set up in all these movies is fucking gone and I fucking was hating this so much.

Pete: Yeah,

Dan: It's, it is all gone very fast, isn't it? And you're wondering who the,

Sidey: the... It's some gardener, is the main villain. What the

Dan: who is the main villain Exactly.

Sidey: Just cut to it.

Pete: Yeah. Yeah. We, we have very quickly at the end of the Cuba stuff.

Your man that Logan the double agent is pissed off Felix has been killed on the boat And so, you know, we've so Obrachev

Reegs: Oh yeah. Yeah. Obrachev

Pete: hasn't basically been acquired by he's now in the hands of the bad

Reegs: That's right.

Sidey: Yeah, Felix is shot on the sort of, oof

Reegs: It's a trawler thing that they were on and we

Sidey: and it's like a, well, it's like a throwback to Vesper dying in the water and Bon having to let him go and let her go and

Dan: in the water and

Sidey: He's bleeding out anyway. Yeah.

Dan: to let him go in the boat.

Sidey: Yeah, he goes all Ramirez and just chills out in a life raft till he's rescued.

Dan: thing. There's a big boat coming along to he's on the shipping lane.

So happy days. And yeah, bond then go. I think he's back to

Pete: Well, he's back, after the London thing with Blofeld and the confrontation, then he, he now needs to find Madeline.

Reegs: he goes off to Norway, doesn't he

Pete: yeah, Norway.

Sidey: She says she told him she was going home. I mean, she literally explicitly said when she has that freak out and blow at Belmar, she says, I'm going home and they're like, how did you know?

It's like she told me. Yeah. Anyway, so she goes home. She's got a kid. You're obviously like, well,

Reegs: his love, like, it's quite an emotional, like, very mushy moment for a bond thing. Like, he really declares his love for her and, you know, wants to make it work and all that,

Sidey: and we've got a kid together.

Dan: Yeah,

Reegs: Yeah, and then she hits him with the the, and then she says it's not yours.

Pete: it at

Sidey: I don't know if it's supposed to be, you know, if you're really supposed to think, well, it's not his, but you're obviously thinking, well, it's obviously that kid. I mean, there's no fucking,

Dan: there's

Reegs: Well, he's the blue eyes. I mean, it

Dan: eyes, and...

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I was

Sidey: I know, but you're always watching Gambler's Hop, it is,

Reegs: She says, I've got something to show you. He says, what another kid, funny. But what it is, is that he's got the backstory of Lucifer, Satan and a snap of his private Island. So we've got scarred villain with a sort of fortress layer thing.

Brilliant. Excellent. Everything you want in a bond. It's

Dan: But it's, it's coming together now because Yeah.

Sidey: Russia's through quite quick.

I'd say from, from now to

Pete: That, that scene where, in Norway, like, where they go out for, that's quite a cool, I like the...

Reegs: Yeah, yeah, yeah, the Land

Sidey: Rover advert. Yeah,

Pete: Yeah.

Reegs: Around the trees and a guy getting bikes.

Pete: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It does. Yeah. And Logan gets crushed by his

Sidey: And Logan gets crushed by his, he's angering, yeah. He's smiling too

Reegs: During this Madeline, who has escaped with Bond and the child Matilde, they, she's shown herself to be a capable gun person anyway, but she gets abducted by Rammy Mallek and taken off to his island fortress. So the stage is set for the final act for bond and oh oh seven to team up take down.

Rami

Sidey: They have a

Reegs: death garden, which they talk about for a

Sidey: a few minutes. They have a glider slash submarine gadget thing, don't they?

Reegs: Yeah, really

Sidey: use to infiltrate the island, and then there's a garden with some plants. What the fuck?

Dan: his father,

Reegs: It was his father. His father had set it up. He'd planted the Garden of Death as a display to impress his clients.

He was an arms dealer.

Dan: as a display to impress his

Reegs: of them will just make you

Dan: was an arms dealer Yeah, so,

Sidey: What this is is a nanobot factory. And they are going to just fucking send these up in missiles.

Do some stuff with some things and um,

Dan: well, it can pick out, it's, it's like a virus that can pick out then individuals and whole, whole ethnicities or, or traits or whatever.

So it is the perfect weapon in the wrong hands.

Reegs: We get an action sequence climax that kind of revolves around Bond meeting Rami Malek's character and then him surprising him with a concealed, was it a Walther PPK that he had? think it was, wasn't it? Concealed Walther PPK that kicks off a bigger action sequence with a great two or three minute long take sequence of him going up the stairs and taking down

Sidey: multiple people. Just going upstairs would

Pete: Yeah.

Reegs: That was pretty cool. And then it ends with this sort of heroic sacrif oh wait,

Sidey: Well he's, he is, he's poisoned. He's, he's contaminated by nanobots and these particular ones are programmed to take out his missus and the kid. And he's already set the ball rolling on getting, so the whole plan is to just airstrike this place. And the airstrike is coming, I think it's four minutes or something away.

And he climbs up some stairs to the top of the fortified bunky bit. Yeah. And calls them and says, sorry, but I'm gonna have to

Pete: Yeah, we should say like 007. So, or know me or whatever her name is. It's got away with, with

Sidey: Yeah. She's

Pete: the daughter. So they're now on another island, but yeah, Bond

Dan: and as I understand it, sorry, just for the, for my understanding of the film there. He'd been injected with this stuff that he couldn't touch then his.

Pete: couldn't go near him,

Dan: go near him, that's right,

Sidey: right. Yeah, it

Pete: right. Yeah, so what he's left with is basically a choice of, of living, like, still killing the bad guy and, and getting the thing, getting all the bad stuff blown up, but even if he does that, he's then got to live and he can't go

Sidey: Which, which you would, which you would do

Dan: the

Sidey: absolutely what you would

Dan: that he loves at all. I'd

Pete: get rid of the bad guys and then go and start a new life somewhere

Cris: in Jamaica. He'd go back to Jamaica.

Pete: a few times already.

Dan: over it

Sidey: Yeah, I, yeah.

So what Bond does is he radios them with everyone listening in and says, tells them what's what, is this, I can't. And they have a very emotional chat where You're talking to someone who's about to die. Telling them how they feel. I'm

Dan: not crying, you're crying.

Sidey: And and then you hear, you start to see where, when they're on the beach, you can see the missiles going past, and then you can hear them fucking coming closer.

And it goes bang, bang, and then one just fucking lands basically right on him.

Pete: it's like, of all

Sidey: think he died.

Pete: quite a few times in all of the Bond films down the years where there's Is he dead? Like there's one in Skyfall. He gets shot and falls off a bridge and you think, well, you know that that could be dead and so on. But this is totally unambiguous . This is like the entire

Sidey: of the game. He

Pete: lands on right on his fucking nose.

Sidey: nothing there to bury. If

Dan: if you don't see him dead, then not dead. Who

Reegs: fade to white tells us absolutely everything that we need.

Dan: What if Q had given him some little special

Reegs: is what I would have done. I would have relied on the big brain Q to bail me out

Dan: out. He's just given

Sidey: But Q in this is a lot more... less fanciful than this. It's like, here's a radio and here's a gun, blah, blah, blah. And so,

Reegs: he has a gun. Yeah

Sidey: but they, it cuts through all that. You see the, the action shot then of the rest of the crew. So, Q's a bit upset.

And well obviously it's Mrs. is fucking blubbing and the rest of them. Tanner looked like he was having a

Pete: Ha

Sidey: but everyone else is upset. And then there's the kind of symbolic

Pete: people handle grief differently,

Sidey: of the whiskey and they're

Reegs: what was the quote? What was the quote? I didn't...

Sidey: it was quite a short one. I, I mean, I only watched it last night. Of course, I still can't remember it.

Pete: Yeah, but they have a weird glass of whiskey for

Sidey: for him. Yeah. Pulling out the homies.

Pete: Yeah, yeah.

Sidey: Um uh and that's

Pete: Well the last scene is Madeline driving with her daughter and basically

Sidey: tell you a story about

Pete: your old man was a good egg, that was

Sidey: Well, she says I want to tell you a story about a man. Bond.

Yeah, James Bond. And it cuts in the credits and at the end of the credits it says James Bond will return. dead. But it will be a

Reegs: But it will be a different James Bond.

Sidey: don't know what kind of story that's gonna

Dan: what

Reegs: So you really didn't like this

Sidey: this? No, I didn't like it. It's it totally shits on all the stuff that would be really good about the series up to this point of like a continuous story, like an overarching really big bad who have been built up to be everywhere, they're in everything, they control everything, everything you think you know, they're, they're ahead of the game.

No, they're all fucking axed in the first third of the movie in a second shown to be like completely inept and it's by Gardner. I'm completely

Pete: I, I'm completely with you side, and I think, you know, like you said about the Brosnan ones, were like, these just like crazy guys with no real Yeah, like with like flimsy agendas and everything.

That's what this guy was like, okay, he got wronged, but his family were killed by a Specter agent, Mr. White and everything like, yeah. But totally with you, it undermines the, I mean there's still good things, there's still cool things in this film, still great scenes in this film, I like what you were talking about there, the introduction of like, you know, like the, like the, the girls and,

Sidey: I like nerds being annoyed is good.

Completely

Pete: like immune to Bond's like charm and everything like that.

Obviously, like, 007, the new one, and so on. There's good ideas, good themes, and everything. I honestly, I agree with you. I think it was a film too far. I can understand why maybe Daniel Craig didn't want to return.

Reegs: It's not as interested in Bond as the character, as the previous movies have been, and exploring who that might be in, in any kind of way. And it's much more interested in paying homage to the tropes of the franchise.

Craig says all, he says Bond, James Bond, he orders a martini that's shaken, not stirred. He, you know, every little bit that you would expect from it. But for me, having just watched Casino Royale, I can't really remember the others and I don't care an awful lot about them. It was quite fun to see him in this completely different, almost like...

Sean Connery and Roger Moore, like, it starts off Casino Royale like that and ends in a completely ridiculous universe now where a gardener is, is, he's not a very good villain. You're right about that. And

Pete: Forgettable. Like, we didn't even talk about their final showdown.

Sidey: it. just shoots them.

Pete: it's, yeah, exactly. It's like...

Reegs: And it's not really clear what he's doing or why he's doing any of it, but I don't think it really matters, because I did enjoy the fact he had an island fortress and Bond was like, being like, campy and quips and stuff.

I just kind of... I think there

Pete: But it, like, kind of tied off all of the, yeah, exactly, like, the final scene should have been Spectre and Blofeld and all of that kind of thing rather than this other guy who just came

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: Yeah, yeah,

Pete: no one had heard

Reegs: maybe, yeah, maybe they should

Sidey: have just... Yeah,

Pete: yeah, what about others around the table?

Cris: I enjoyed it. I didn't, I didn't really look into it as much depth as you, especially because I don't remember all the other ones and I watched them all. Not necessarily in order, so I found it really confusing to remember which one was which and what happened in which one.

So, I just took it as a, well it's a James Bond movie. I mean, is it gonna be an Oscar winning performance by anyone? Probably not.

Sidey: beef though. It had that

Reegs: I mean, what's the James Bond movie?

Cris: don't get me wrong, but it's a James Bond movie. If I'm gonna go watch a James Bond movie, I expect him to

Sidey: all the other ones were

Cris: And, and be the main man. and

Sidey: All the other ones were just James Bond movies.

This one, they were trying to do that thing. That's

Pete: it. That's absolutely right. It was, they were building towards it. All the other films, if you do watch, if you did watch them in order, so say if you sat down and, and watched 'em over the course of the next week, they are building towards a crescendo.

That will be the finale that they then completely. Disappeared up their own

Sidey: took a shit on it.

Reegs: I don't really, his death feels really forced in this. And it's like, you know, it's supposed to be Oh, he's found the meaning of life through family or whatever. And that's how he can be at

Sidey: That's why he's happy to die.

Reegs: die. At peace, yeah.

Sidey: Yeah, he's

Reegs: really, it's, right, you've got to go look after your kid.

Fuck it, I'm staying here on the mountain. But I did enjoy Bond as a dad, though. Making pancakes and carrying a kid through the forest and

Pete: Dad,

Reegs: that

Pete: Bond. Yeah. Dan?

Dan: Yeah. Well, for me, I kind of agree with Chris, you know, I don't, remember watching all the Bonds in order.

I've seen a few Bonds, but some of them went back to Sean Connery this week.

Pete: We're talking about the Daniel Craig ones

Dan: the, the, the Daniel Craig ones, then like Riggs, I remember Casino Royale and then this one very different movies. I enjoyed it in the fact that it's a, it's a Bond, it's an escape. It could have been almost like a John Wick kind of thing.

You know, it was, it wasn't really doing anything. It was just action. It was. going for it. It was, I didn't understand the Spectre bit and the, the Vesper. And I thought maybe I've missed a film out here or I've missed some information. So that kind of left me hanging a little bit in this film where I was thinking, didn't.

Quite connect the dots for me. But she was really hot. Ticks bond girls, gadgets ticks, you know, the, the different kind of twists and turns. It was decent. I liked it. It wasn't too bad at all, but it wasn't the best bond film I've

Pete: it. It wasn't too bad at all, but it

Sidey: him. Dalton.

Pete: the best Bond

Reegs: favourite. Casino Royale, of all the Bond movies, is my

Pete: People give

Reegs: Without a doubt.

Sidey: give Quantum Assault a shit. It's better than this. It's better than

Pete: than

Cris: Which one of them is called Quantum of

Pete: no, it's

Cris: Is it the one with Olga Kurilenko? Yeah, okay.

Pete: Kurilenko.

Sidey: follows immediately after Casino Royale. Yeah.

Cris: I remember that one.

Sidey: So stats about Daniel Craig's the longest running bond

Pete: Daniel Craig? The longest

Sidey: no, in terms

Reegs: Amount of running he

Pete: running he actually did.

Sidey: he injured himself making this, but not doing some crazy stunt, just walking around the set. He just fell over and broke his ankle. What an idiot.

And they had to do extensive reshoots because this was COVID and all the product placement became irrelevant.

Pete: mean, it is, it is a incredible, like, spectacle, visual, like, you know, film. It's ridiculous a lot. You know, that in itself, what the, the Bond franchise has, has made a massive, like comeback from the, the, the dark days of the like fucking Brosnan years and, and I think overtaken the born like, you know, franchise, which overtook bond for a little

Sidey: I think it had to sort of mimic some of

Pete: did, and it did the right thing. I, I'm with you though, so I don't think they just fucked up the,

Sidey: the, they, they jumped the shark,

Pete: yeah, they did, they did, yeah.

Dan: I wouldn't be surprised if a grittier origin story for the next Bond,

Pete: Grittier, again. It's going to start getting really dark to get grittier, because some of the, some of it is, is full

Cris: on. I, think it's gonna be the girl, like the daughter or something. They have to be, if they're not gonna bring a, a guy to be like the beginnings or something, the only other option is to just kind of do a

Sidey: a... I just don't think that's Fleming's story though, is it? And there's other, you know, there's other, Anna Damas is playing, is it ballerina? The from the John Wick universe, so there's other stuff.

You don't need to make Bond female, other than if you want to make some weird point about diversity or whatever, but there's plenty of other stories that you can do in their own right. I don't know, whatever,

Pete: maybe it'll be James Bond Jr.

Reegs: Jr. yeah.

Cris: JBJ.

Dan: Well, that's next. So, recommend for you

Sidey: Strong recommend for me.

Cris: Strong recommend.

Yeah.

Reegs: I enjoyed this.

Sidey: James Bond Jr. I think this is like a one or two year only run time that it's

Reegs: it's had. What

Sidey: Shit, that's quite a lot.

Pete: Simon. Did

Dan: Did you start the same episode as me? Episode 1, 1, 1, 1. Yeah. The beginning.

Reegs: One,

Sidey: Although I wasn't sure when I started watching it, it seemed like I'd joined something midway through.

Dan: Yeah. There

Sidey: Because it's a car chase or

Reegs: joined something midway through. Yeah. It was a car

Sidey: And I was thinking, is that the... DB5 he's in because it's a silverish sporty looking car the animation style is kind of like we're in

Reegs: Yeah. terrible. I think

Pete: I was getting strong mask vibes, getting strong

Sidey: it's that kind of style animation and he

Pete: t bobb to this,

Sidey: very American looking and then he talks and he's Yarr,

Reegs: got the weirdest voice.

Pete: it's a terrible English. They, they might as well have got Dick Van Dyken. It was a fucking shit, British accent.

Sidey: And he's at, he's at university

Reegs: well, I just, we've got to mention because he drives off in the, the, the silver thing and then it's been

Sidey: drives off a cliff

Reegs: He's been, yeah, he drives off a cliff, and he's been ch and it turns into a jet thing, doesn't it?

Sidey: He presses the,

Reegs: it's got a

Sidey: single prop. There's no way that was

Pete: Flight mode.

Reegs: And the guy, he's chasing him in his Rolls Royce, he gets out, and his, his henchman is Jaws, from the...

Obviously, Bond films. And he says something like,

Sidey: Fuck this. Yeah.

Reegs: That's his name,

Pete: His name is Scumlord. Scumlord. Yeah. What we haven't spoken about

Cris: That's

Pete: but it's the, have we had the title song?

Sidey: No, it comes

Reegs: get it now. Now

Pete: sorry.

Sidey: Now we get a really shit, I mean really, really shit theme track. I'm not putting it in, it's that bad, I don't wanna, I don't wanna inflict it

Dan: was a little bit shocked by Scumlord. That is language that wouldn't have flown in my

Pete: you're a bit of a scum

Reegs: he leads the Scum, that's the Saboteurs and Criminals United in Mayhem network.

Pete: mask vibes with like a lot of mask vibes. Uh

Reegs: Um, so yeah. Anyway, we get basically the setup for it, which is Bond is a, a academy.

Oh, in, in the intro it even says about bond. It's, it's something about, oh, it's his uncle by the way, or whatever. . It's gonna say. He, it's a, sets the scene.

Pete: Right, so, so for it to be his uncle, and if we're staying in Bond's world, like, Bond Right, but the only brother Bond had was Blofeld.

Dan: Or...

Reegs: so he had a son

Pete: So Blo, this is Blofeld's son we're dealing with here. Yeah. If we're staying in the, the Bond universe, and it was an obviously adopted

Dan: Bond got married and he's kind of

Reegs: No, no, no, they definitely

Sidey: want to

Pete: does that, he got married and what? And

Reegs: had his own

Dan: just kind of then... Then

Reegs: Got married to his sister!

Dan: kid just calls him Uncle James, you know?

Pete: his his, missus had, no, no, no, it's a stretch that I'm going to go with Blofeld's son, and I hope that, that later on in this, in the Next, we're dissecting "No Time to Die," Daniel Craig's swan song as James Bond. This film brings a mix of old-school Bond elements with a modern twist. Rami Malek's chilling villain, the emotional depth, and of course, some jaw-dropping action sequences – there's so much to discuss. We'll delve into how this film wraps up Craig's tenure as 007 and how it sets a new direction for the franchise. 65 episodes, there's a reveal that Blofeld is James Bond Jr's dad, that might redeem some of this.

Reegs: He's at Warfield Academy, which is coincidentally housing...

Everyone he knows but in a younger format, literally everyone. So Felix's kid is there, Q's kid is there, called IQ. Do you get it,

Pete: And I think it was his grandad. Wasn't it

Reegs: Oh, it was his grand,

Pete: Yeah, yeah. And then even the guy who runs the academy, his son is like his daughter, sorry, is

Reegs: it's like...

It's money, there's money pennies there or something or other. There

Pete: not,

Dan: little bit of Scooby Doo vibes going on

Reegs: And they've, one of them's a fucking surfer dude character. Yeah, it's, oh,

Sidey: This is,

Reegs: And they play football outside with a character called Trevor Noseworthy. Who's the bad guy, I

Dan: He's

Pete: I think. In this particular cartoon, Bond needs to get the, after it's

Dan: Well, in this particular cartoon, Bond needs to get the car back after it's stolen. That's right. It's got some special transponder

Reegs: it's an electromagnetic pulse generator,

Dan: it. It's got one of those in it. It

Reegs: It says it will knock out databases within a 50 mile radius. Imagine how inconvenient that would be for a small number of people.

Pete: number of

Dan: ha ha

Pete: even that irritated me because Scumlord says... Oh, no, no, we're not gonna steal the car.

He's gonna bring it to us, but he doesn't he basically says Oh, there's a package at the post office for you and he goes to the post office and they go and steal it from there So he does go and get the fucking car. He doesn't deliver it to him.

Dan: like the way that Jaws, he, he kind of... does the wires together and he looks back to reverse doesn't he at one point as well which i thought was a nice touch

Pete: he's being careful he's not he's not a

Dan: he manages to to kidnap bond jr and um the the girl that

Pete: Tracy is It

Dan: They're in the back of the car they're able to escape it because of the watch that q gave him earlier with a little buzzsaw in it and a laser and then he's going to fly, he think he's going to fly the car, the car, which is in a plane that is taken off and flying.

You think he's gonna fly out and fly, but he can't get all that going. It's broken. So he has to, he ends up parachuting out after crashing into jaws. It was quite a, a scene. I thought it was I was getting quite into this at this point. Yeah, it's about 20 minutes long. I can't remember this first time around.

I don't

Pete: know. No, I haven't seen

Sidey: I hadn't seen this before. It almost feels like it was never broadcast in the UK.

Reegs: It was though, it was. It was, it was an ITV

Sidey: Oh, that's why we had an embargo on

Pete: did like about it in terms of continuity is that the car, James Bond Jr's cars were right hand drive, as they should be. So there was continuity there.

Sidey: you want to run down some of the other character names in later episodes?

Dan: Yeah.

Pete: for

Reegs: have you got Shake Your Booty on there?

Sidey: Well, Scumlord Jaws, Nick Nack's in it. Dr. Deranged Skullcap. Ulric Goldfinger and Oddjobber in it.

Pete: I wonder, like, I can, you can imagine what

Dan: What he

Sidey: Spoiler, Walker D. Plank.

Reegs: yeah.

Pete: no!

Sidey: the comedian, Tiara Hotstones. Sounds like, could have been from the movies.

Reegs: Oddjobs in this, but he's dressed as Flavor Flav. You've seen it. He is. Honestly, I

Pete: Yeah, boy!

Sidey: Lotta De Niro Terry Firmer. Haley Comet, Wendy Day, Sergeant Victoria Province, Princess, and Princess Yasmin, who was from Aladdin, wasn't she? Crossover.

Reegs: This remains the only ever television adaptation of James Bond.

Sidey: it, was it licensed by Ian Fleming? This

Pete: This would have been... Fleming died in... Early

Sidey: like, died in...

Dan: May have finished him off.

Reegs: The animation wasn't very good and the voice work is awful. Yeah,

Sidey: voice work is awful. I did Well, his name is largely irrelevant, but Corey Burton, but do you know some of the other voice acting work he has done? hE was Shockwave in Transformers.

Reegs: Okay.

Sidey: That's a good one. And in the animated Star Wars universe, he did Count Dooku and Cad Bane.

Reegs: So not all, not all

Sidey: some good stuff in there. Yeah,

Pete: animated, sorry, sorry, sorry. Yep.

Sidey: He's not, it's not Christopher Lee.

Pete: I was gonna say

Dan: This, these can all be found on YouTube. I think you can probably get all 60 odd episodes on there. I didn't think that... This was this bad.

Sidey: Oh, it's really

Dan: it was all right.

No, I disagree. I was quite getting into this and I know it's the kind of thing I would have enjoyed watching when I was a kid. I think if I think back to when I was watching these kind of cartoons and these series and I don't know then if it's It's a separate story each time but I kind of got the feeling that it was going to carry

Sidey: not be a reset.

Dan: did say Say the beginning obviously, so

Sidey: But the thing is,

Dan: was some kind of

Sidey: you could watch, as a kid, you could watch the Bond stuff. There might be slightly redacted versions, but you could watch them. So if I went to watch this as a kid, I'd be like, this is horseshit, let me just watch Dalton.

Pete: think if you take it out of the Bond world and make it its own

Sidey: don't

Pete: don't know, I, okay, so I watched it all, 21 minutes, whatever it was.

And I wasn't like, oh fucking come on, oh this is, oh I want to turn it off, that. So there was enough in it for me

Dan: I half debated watching another one, me. Did you?

Yeah,

Pete: Yeah. It was more because I was enjoying how shit it was I think. I got, I got kicks out of that,

Sidey: Mm How'd you feel about it?

Reegs: Nah, I didn't really like this very much.

It, yeah, just didn't like the animation, didn't like the voice work, didn't like the characters, didn't like the plot, a lot.

Sidey: No, wasn't for me this

Dan: So

Reegs: But it was nice to have some positivity from you,

Dan: we had Sherlock Holmes.

Reegs: It was not in that

Dan: it was a, you know, but a similar big character taken to

Sidey: They did a better job with it. They did a better job of

Reegs: think the alcoholism and, like, sexual politics of Bond is quite hard to translate to a teen cartoon.

Sidey: Yeah, if there'd been more of that, that would have been good.

Pete: I don't even think this was a teen car. It was just like a kid's thing,

Dan: It's valuable feedback for the

Pete: Well, I would say my two year old liked the initial car chase bit. Like, he was just going, car, wow, car, wow. Like, that was good, but other than that, wank.

Dan: Okay, so if you like cars,

Sidey: And wanking.

Dan: wow.

Pete: Strong recommend.

Dan: The button where we just say, Dan's gone.

Sidey: Oh, you had the Dan's gone button?

Pete: Is there a Dan's gone button?

Sidey: No, Dan wants to get a Dan's gone button so he doesn't have to say that.

Reegs: that. That increases efficiency across every week.

Dan: across

Sidey: I think, are you here next week Pete?

Pete: I dunno,

Sidey: Because you were been threatening to nominate for a little while

Pete: Yeah. But I, I, I'll have a look at

Sidey: We'll play it bit or by then shall we?

Yeah. Okay. It's bond week. I'm a

Reegs: who did we agree? Who was the best

Pete: bond? Well, that's it. I, I felt like tonight was gonna, there would be more,

Sidey: of a celebration of bond. I feel like we've got

Pete: and I going like head to head over between Moore and Dalton as to who the best bond is. And we know it's more.

Cris: What about Sean Connery?

Pete: Oh, fucking absolutely. Celebr brilliant. Probably,

Cris: Is he not the best one?

Pete: favorite. I just, I liked how there's a load of

Cris: He's got the best accent.

Sidey: We grew up, we, the ones that were on a lot when we were growing up were Roger Moore.

Pete: yeah, of that

Sidey: And he's got a high volume. Low quality.

Pete: like, all the others, what, you know, Daniel Craig has to do with his physique and Connery would do with his presence and everything like that.

Roger Moore did with an eyebrow. It was just, yeah, he could like, turn absolutely everything into a sexual innuendo, which was what Bond was about in the late 70s, 80s, that kind of thing. You know, you look at like, Live and Let Die, brilliant. Best Bond film for me.

Sidey: Cool. Right, well all that remains is to say, Sidey signing out.

Reegs: Reid's

Pete: I'm out.

Cris: out. Chris is done.

Dan: out.