The Sapphires & The Magic Prank Show

The Sapphires

Reegs: Do you think that they must have made a gay team? They must have done A. It's a gay porno. The gay team. They must have done.

Welcome to Bad Dad's Film Review. Still going, well, not exactly strong, but still going at least. Inspired by Dan undergoing some sort of treatment earlier today, we decided to kick things off tonight with a chat about the top five scans. I love a scan, me.

Like getting a backstage pass to your own body and internal organs. And then there's the actual procedure itself as you lie there Half naked and vulnerable, wondering if the technician is secretly judging your spleen as they cocoon you into a tiny plastic tube and fire you into a machine that sounds like a cross between a photocopier and a black hole.

After that we'll be reviewing the heartwarming tale of four Australian Aboriginal sisters who formed a soul group and took their harmonies to Vietnam during the war in 2012's The Sapphires. And then we'll be finishing things up with Netflix's The Magic Book. prank show with Justin Willman in which Jeremy Beadle and Paul Daniels combine to wreak PTSD on people.

Now, a quick heads up for new listeners, there will be profanity and spoilers ahead so if that's a problem for you, go back to your podcast about organic kale farming or whatever it is. But if you're going to carry on, all that's left to do is introduce the dads. Starting like, starting with Dan, who, like many of our listeners, was born.

In the past, so that's relatable, isn't it?

Dan: Thank you.

Sidey: A long, long time.

in the past.

Reegs: yeah. And after that we have Chris, a man so good looking mirrors fight over who gets to reflect him. But if you did listen right the way through to the end of last week's episode, you will have learned that this beauty comes at the cost of crippling anxiety about snooker playing robots declaring war on humanity.

Sidey: on

Cris: true.

Reegs: And we also have Sidey, our resident enigma. Is he a man? Is he a myth? A sentient beard? We're not quite sure and it doesn't matter. And also there's me, Reegs. Hello.

Sidey: Hello,

I'm glad you did the intro. today. There was a lot of pressure doing the intro. Yeah. Starting the show. Yeah, so I'm glad you took that off me this week.

Reegs: Yeah. G'day.

Sidey: Did anyone watch any good stuff?

Dan: Yeah, I did.

I watched dark Waters with mark Ruffalo last night, which yeah, which it, it is, yeah. It, it's not the, it's not the same which was the story of

DuPont's chemical companies dumping shit everywhere

and

how Teflon pans it all given his cancer It was decent though.

Sidey: decent though. I don't

Dan: Don't know.

Yeah, I think it but is it It's pretty much guaranteed, like 99 percent of the world has this

PFOA

chemical in them. It can't be broken down and,

Sidey: to with

Dan: you know it's coming. And yeah, it was quite an interesting and scary tale because it's literally like In living memory, it's just come to a court case and people are starting to take responsibility for it but it was a good story.

Yeah, also caught up with Shogun,

Sidey: Right.

Dan: good, which is is getting really

Sidey: Shogun

y.

Dan: Shogunny exactly

Sidey: Christian?

Cris: I'm on episode three of Shogun.

Dan: Okay

Cris: I'd say this. I still, I still want to slap myself every time I watch it though, because it's on Disney plus I'm so annoyed with myself.

Dan: Yeah,

you're going to have to take the rough with the smooth there, but,

Cris: I can't even look at myself in the mirror after I watched it, but it's very good and it does stick to the book. So I did enjoy the first three episodes. I've also watched. I think I don't know if I told you this or not, because I can't really remember much these days. I've watched Gunpowder.

It's a three part series with Kit

Dan: Oh, yeah.

Sidey: Oh, Yeah. Yeah

Cris: the Guy

Fawkes thing. He blows up the parliament and that. To be fair in the third episode, I can't remember.

I knew what was going to happen, and I knew he didn't blow up the parliament, so it was a bit of an anti climax. But I did watch that. And I also watched the Bob Marley One Love movie.

Reegs: think the trailer makes that look fucking awful.

Cris: It's

not as good as

Reegs: The trailer.

Dan: The trailer

Cris: Yeah, no, and I find it quite annoying because the music is good. I like Bob Marley's music and I, you know, it's the same like everyone else is inspirational and all that stuff, but it's not only the only good thing is they actually stick to proper Jamaican accent, like slang.

And however, he probably used to speak I've never met him. So, you know, but the, the movie itself It's yeah, I know I might do whenever the day comes, but it's a bit disappointing because it has a few actors that I know and I've seen them in actually in better movies and I just as production, the way it's, I don't know, it's just.

It looks like a B movie really. And it's been a cinema everywhere and all that stuff. So it, it feels, it feels like a, just like a small screen movie. But they made it like

Dan: Made for tv. Yeah. I must admit I thought he's a bit trailer trash as well. I wasn't really sucked in by That little snippet that i'd seen but we'll see maybe one day i'll get mad at watching it.

Did you see anything?

Sidey: Me?

I watched Captain America Winter Soldier.

Dan: I really like Scarlett Johansson

Sidey: Yeah, like that one. I really like Scarlett Hansel in that. And I've been watching Fallout it's a new series on

Amazon

Dan: that as well. It's

Reegs: the first episode of that as

Well, really,

Sidey: Really, good. really good.

I've fallen asleep in every episode

so far though. but that's Because I'm

just tired. But yeah, it's excellent.

Right, what's

Dan: Right, what's the

premise

Sidey: there? like? It's something like, superhero kinda looking No, It's got, it's got a,

Cris: No, it's got a sort

Reegs: No, it's got a sort of retro futuristic vibe to it. It could take, it's set in 2077

initially, but the tech looks kind of

Sidey: you see when they, when it, when the nukes drop is sort of like fifties Americana and so that's the, style that they've maintained in these bunkers.

And then when they go out into then, you know, overground.

Reegs: an irradiated wasteland,

Sidey: Keiko

and the wonder beasts?

Dan: yeah, yeah,

Sidey: Yeah, a little bit like,

mutant animals and stuff. Supremely fucking violent.

Reegs: Yeah Great. And funny as well. Yeah.

Sidey: yeah, it's cool. Three episodes in. And it's How many

Cris: seasons?

Sidey: season one's just dropped, but it's good because they dropped it all in one go. You don't

Cris: you don't know. It's written by Jonathan Nolan, so Christopher's brother.

Reegs: Written by Jonathan Nolan.

Sidey: Christopher's brother.

Christopher's

Cris: the movies

Reegs: a lot of the movies

Sidey: And did Westworld as

Dan: Do they have any sisters? The Nolan sisters?

Sidey: Yeah. Riggs?

Reegs: Yeah,

I also

saw the first episode of Fallout. I also saw a show that was once described to me by former bad dad Meigs wife as that show where they tried to guess whether a baked good is an inanimate object. Is it cake? Yeah, season three. I have good family fun. Strong recommend for watching that with the

Dan: Okay, nice.

Reegs: I know everybody else

Sidey: could you bake that would be most convincingly like an inanimate object?

Reegs: you'd like in an animal object? And perhaps if they're really far away. Do you, can

Sidey: And it helps if they're really far away when you're trying to judge it as well.

Yeah.

okay, cool. Do you can you remember as far ago as

one week? because we did a Top five which was about soldiers.

Dan: yes.

Sidey: Do you remember that?

Dan: soldiering irons.

Sidey: And we have some nominations on the Discord server. chat who I believe is Adam Mo.

Top five. He's He's done a whole five. Van Damme in the Universe of

Soldier. Lieutenant

Dan Kyle Kyle Reese. Colonel Nathan Jessup.

That's,

Dan: that's

Sidey: Jack Nixon And private Joker.

So, Yeah. I think we did a

few of those. Mel says Fun fact that her daughter told her, the three men to play Spider Man, Andrew Garfield, Tom Holland and Tobey Maguire, all played soldiers in other films.

Reegs: And,

Sidey: this is not soldiery, but, and their on screen girlfriends, Emma Stone, Zendaya and Kirsten Dunst all went on

to play tennis players.

Reegs: soldiers.

Sidey: And

and Zendaya, I think, has a threesome in her tennis one. It's yet to be released.

Cris: I've seen the trailer for that, but,

Sidey: yeah, it's horny, isn't it?

Dan: isn't it?

Don't really

Sidey: Very good. Um, Darren Ethi really liked that. He also said, More soldiers, kicking myself not thinking this one earlier, a Tommy Py. I don't know if that's pronounced correctly, the near silent former Finnish Special Forces one man death squad turned gold

Cris: Oh

Sidey: turned Nazi annihilator in one of his favourite films from last year that wasn't past lives Sisu.

Which I remember you talking about, you really liked that. And he also mentions Adam. Statham's character in the beekeeper, he's a one man army, sort of, some kind of special forces type

beekeeping thing. Yeah and then Rocket said, breachy Rocket says, in past lives, you see a tiny scene of teo. Yo

doing

a bit of military service.

Yeah. So

able to shoot And she said Then you can shoot on your both your favorite films of 2023 into the top five.

Reegs: All right, well

Sidey: That's the kind of shit that Goes Down on our Discord server

Reegs: I'm putting both

Sidey: Yeah, they're in Yeah.

Dan: Solid stuff.

Sidey: Right,

This is top five scans. Scans took quite a long time to pin you down to this.

Dan: Yeah, well it was gonna be a surprise.

Sidey: sort

of chaotic Yeah. Nomination week when you're involved,

Reegs: you sent us a picture this morning, you were going for a colonoscopy, was it? Or it was something like

Dan: I just go up there, I mean you have to pay, but I like it. You know, it's I find some ailment

Sidey: keeps you regular scan. Yeah.

Dan: Just scan me. So I thought, yeah, let's, Let's see what scanning and it's quite a rich a rich field of Of scans, I mean you can you can

Sidey: scan You

Dan: Anything, you know, I think the one I would start with maybe would be from filth.

And it would be oh chris might have that one i'll leave i'll

Cris: Don't worry. I've got, I've got more.

Dan: got another scan. Well, I like i'm

Cris: favorite topic as well. That's so you can have that one.

Dan: I'm gonna start with wall e

Sidey: Oh, yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dan: He was the the friendly little robot on a world that had just died really everybody's living up in the sky on planet on spaceships, Because the earth is no longer Habitable um, but Wally is down there in this great garbage dump of earth and he has a little scanning device for various things, but he's looking for plant

Sidey: organic matter.

Isn't it?

Dan: matter And it is such a brilliant film.

I mean there's there's I don't think there's a word in it. Is there maybe

Sidey: there is later on but it's light on dialogue to start

Dan: really, really light on dialogue but not for enjoyment. It's just, it's so clever because you just can't take your eyes off, off this little robot scanning and, and wandering around and all the kind of emotion that you wouldn't think is possible in an animated robot, but it completely nails it.

Reegs: And yeah, you hate Pixar, don't you really?

Sidey: I was thinking that when he was talking I was like, yeah,

Reegs: not gonna, I'm just gonna keep that

Sidey: I like that one I just think they're overrated, but yes,

that is a good one.

Dan: Yeah, they may be overrated but this one is is worthy of their rating.

Sidey: Yep.

Christian?

Cris: Yes, I have I have three that fall under the same scan type is an eye scan.

Sidey: Oh, I've got it. Yeah, I've got it. I've got

a subset of them. Yeah, go for

Cris: Okay. I didn't really, I have to say, I didn't really prepare myself too much for that, but I,

Dan: a week to do

Sidey: had, you must have had an eye scan in your time.

I've

Cris: had more than one in the last year. I've had about 50. But the first one that I thought of was in. The Demolition Man,

Sidey: Yes

Cris: where Wesley Snipes character, Simon Phoenix, I think his name is. He needs, yeah, he just basically gouges, gouges, how do you say that? Gouges someone's eyes, eye, and just puts it in a pencil or something and just

Sidey: just, Or he just holds it?

in his hand and he takes the

Cris: out, the guy's eye out, and he just kind of scans the eye, which is a great

Reegs: Oh, well, you've got the same thing in Minority Report,

Cris: I was gonna, I've got that as well, yeah, which is Minority Report, and in red. Bruce Willis absolute classic.

Reegs: We did that for the pod.

Sidey: You

Reegs: picked

it, yeah, it was colour, colour week, yeah.

Cris: Red meaning retired and extremely dangerous. Apparently in CIA language,

Reegs: What, do they do the eye thing in that?

Cris: He is he breaks into the Pentagon and he has A lens, like a contact

Reegs: Oh, yeah,

Cris: put on his eye, and the woman

Reegs: has to pretend to be his girlfriend or whatever.

Cris: whatever. She's, no, she's his aide, in, dressed in the same, like, military clothes. But when the, they open the door, she drops the contact lens, and she drops it on the floor in the elevator, and then the guys come, and she's on her knees in front of him.

And she's like, oh, the general lost his contact lens. And they're all like,

Reegs: Okay

Cris: okay. And then, yeah. So that, I have three of them in one go.

Reegs: That's nice. I thought of The Exorcist I went to see it at the cinema and really the sound design around the secret sequence where she has a carotid angiography and she's being subjected to all these tests and there's like these blocks put either side of her head and they sort of make this horrible, horrible noise.

The sound design. It's not, it was, it was a carotid angiography.

Cris: Oh really? I've had an MRI scan and it sounded pretty much the same.

Reegs: Yeah, I've had an

Cris: MRI scan, On my eyes, yeah. Ah, right, okay, yeah, sorry, okay.

Reegs: And they tried to use real medical staff in that thing to give it that air of authenticity.

And one of the guys in that scene, an orderly, is an actual suspected serial killer, Paul Bateson.

Dan: They

Reegs: lending more twistedness to

Dan: can pick them can't they?

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Wow. Well, I immediately thought of

scanners. Yeah. And I'm told that the best scanner you can get is the PlusTech Optic film, 8,200 ISE, Yeah.

Dan: right?

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Widely regarded to be the best 35 millimeter film scanner on the market.

It

Dan: is.

it is

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: which was that the X

Sidey: It's the 3,200 ISE. ISE, yeah.

Reegs: Sorry. Yeah.

Sidey: You probably think of the A100. Yeah. Yeah.

So make sure you get a hold of one of those. There is also a movie called Scanners.

I don't know if you're familiar with that.

Dan: familiar with

Sidey: poster up for it is a fucking immense.

Dan: fucking immense. Yeah,

Reegs: have seen it.

It's the

Sidey: It's like this one with the guy in the chair. and it's everything seems to be sort of melting or slash on fire

Dan: I haven't seen the film though.

Sidey: It's amazing. You must have seen the

scene.

Dan: I've seen parts of it,

Sidey: There's the

panel going on.

Reegs: It's really early in the movie as

Sidey: Yeah, and so they can scan whatever. But he, he, like, he does the thing to the guy and you just see him become uncomfortable.

And it become more and more uncomfortable and pained

And until his

head

just fucking explodes

And it's not like implied . that It's very graphically typical Cronenberg

Reegs: of visually reminiscent of one of the pranks in the magic thing

Sidey: it's actually, yeah.

Dan: see it's all linked together.

Reegs: Kronenberg

Sidey: So there's two different scanners there.

for you.

Dan: well I've got another scanner for you. It's a bit of a thumb scan. And back to the future.

It's Marty McFly, Back to the Future 2, Marty McFly, instead of door handles, they've got like scanners to get in.

And you see on the, on the news that there's like, thumb bandits who are amputating people's thumbs to

Sidey: oh,

Dan: able to get

Sidey: they would, didn't it?

Dan: And Biff even plays for, pays for a taxi just with his thumbprint as they go. It's not that far off. And you think a lot of this this technology. Back in the day, seventies, eighties, or whatever is now actually coming true.

You know, these scans of, of eye retina scans and, you know, biometrics and everything that we've, we've got it's starting to come to the future and this was back to the future.

Cris: And this is the present day.

Reegs: Yeah.

So

Cris: it's, it's all

Dan: with us out there. Stay with us. It is confusing.

Cris: Yeah. As previously stated by our host I've got the scan in filth James McAvoy, character, character,

huh? James McAvoy's character he scans his private parts on a scanner at work, but he presses enlarge. Six, seven times because he knows that one of his colleagues, this really attractive woman, likes people with big dicks,

Sidey: Who's the colleague

Oh, Of course.

Dan: remember if I've

Sidey: I'm trying to remember if i've seen that film

or not.

Dan: read, I've read the book. I've seen the film, but the book is, is brilliant. Yes, Irving Welsh. And and it around this scene, he's it's an office party, you know, they're all having a bit of fun and the girls have done their bum or their boobs or something. And then they're talked into the boys doing it.

He goes, right, I'll, I'll kind of do it up about four or five

Cris: No, but he, he also hears the conversation with her that, Oh, I met with this guy and he, he didn't have a big dick. So, Oh, it's so annoying. I really love someone with a big dick. And he knows that. So he kind of,

Dan: a big dick and he knows that. You know, over the desk in one of the offices he says the look on disappointment on her face

Sidey: face.

Yeah, He didn't

Dan: Yeah, yeah, but he he didn't care he he was one of these kind of he was filth, you know, he was horrible But yeah Good scan.

Cris: Yes

Reegs: Well, it's a very common trope across movies and medical dramas for people to have the results of a scan and look at it, you know, against the white light and maybe instantly deduce that somebody's, you know, very ill or, or that they're clear or whatever. And I, there are many countless examples of this across Grey's anatomy and house and Breaking Bad.

It's in that, I think probably my favorite filmed example is gotta be Jackass. Where Ryan Dunn

Sidey: Dunn hides

Reegs: toy. No, he hides a, he hides a, a sort of, what is it? Like a Hot Wheels car up his

Sidey: sort of,

Reegs: into hospital and gets himself x rayed, it's so stupid. But yeah, there it

Dan: I

Sidey: goes into the

hospital and gets himself X rayed, it's so stupid.

But yeah, there it is, you can go. because he did a whole documentary you know, about awareness and trying to get checked and picking it up. But they filmed him going in to get his final set of results. And they could have been like, no, you're going to fucking die. and they sat down and like, you know, the cancer hasn't come back, you're okay.

And It's fucking really emotional watching it,

Reegs: ridiculous. Yeah, tense.

Sidey: have been a fucking like death sentence. Anyway, I have some more retinal scans, because I said before I did

have

Dan: have Aye, aye.

Sidey: Mission Impossible 2. The opening scene is Tom

Cruise climbing

a Mountain

with no He probably did it for real because he's that

crazy and then he puts he puts on his Oakleys

Dan: did it.

Sidey: and they retinal scan to check his ID. And then he gets the the

spiel, the mission.

Cris: He's

Reegs: he throws

Sidey: to, He's gone through all that and then he's, it would have blown his face off.

He had to throw them away before they self

Reegs: Don't they sort of matrix in the air or something? The camera like revolves

Sidey: it? It, yeah, it does a, he throws it and it, you know, blah.

blah, blah.

Reegs: Amazing.

Sidey: Men is a fairly mundane one, but this is just Professor X has to do a retinal scan to get access to Cerebro.

Reegs: get access

Sidey: big scanner

yeah, yeah, planetary.

Dan: Oh, I had this

Sidey: They, they, Deckard

uses the retinal scan to detect

Reegs: Kampff test. Yeah,

Dan: Yeah, it's

Sidey: the Voight Kampff test. And

it it measures Capillary dilation.

Dan: Involuntary

dilation,

Sidey: how they can tell if they're a replicant or not. And stats. That movie was set in 2019. Yeah. And Roy Batty dies in that movie in 2019.

And Rutger Howard died. In 2019.

So it's probably

a true

story.

Dan: Wow, yeah.

Sidey: do we have

androids

Reegs: and shit now?

Sidey: Yeah,

Cris: you can have sex with them.

Sidey: Yeah,

Reegs: When they're not playing snooker. Yep.

Sidey: What about kind of amusing scans?

Dan: Yeah, go on, hit me.

Sidey: I suppose it's quite amusing In Total recall.

yeah. Where they go through the scanner and Arnie's got a gun.

Yeah. And he

Dan: they

have

Sidey: bust through. they

Dan: x ray, don't they?

Which now again is pretty much standard technology in airports and things,

Sidey: They can see your dick, can't they

Reegs: can,

Dan: they can't see mine.

Sidey: they all look at it. If you see them all crowded around a monitor. and they're all laughing.

Like, oh.

Dan: Yeah,

Reegs: Oy.

Come and look at this guy.

Sidey: at this?

Dan: Gonna bring him over bring him over. Yeah, that's it. They they had that one I think running man had I mean a few arnie films. You probably terminate her

Sidey: see which one are they

Reegs: Running, man,

Sidey: Edgar Wright is directing it.

Reegs: Oh,

Dan: Oh,

Reegs: and who's in it? I can't, I saw who was in it.

It was a act, John actor, I

Sidey: Yes, it was. Yeah.

Dan: love to think they're going to do it right, Gattaca, which we did for the pod

had this kind of DNA, DNA,

Sidey: yeah, yeah. Well everyone was getting scanned their front and center, weren't they? Yeah. and

Dan: they're all being scanned. And so, it seems to be very much a, a thing that we're all going to have to get used to more and more, whether it be through health or security.

There's going to be lots of scanning in,

Reegs: Oh, you'll be on a database as soon as you're born,

Dan: Oh, yeah, well, this is it. You'll, you'll, they'll know everything they need to know about you, whether you've got going to have a heart defect or you're going to live to 300. District 9 was another one that was interesting, so it was this film about aliens landing and basically being held within a, a camp and

part

of their alien tech, and they've got guns, but it doesn't actually work for humans because the, the scanners that they've got on the triggers will only work for alien species or whatever, only work for, for the prawns.

But you think again, you know, there's a, that will probably be a, a happening thing if it's not already happening.

Reegs: What, alien prawns? And

Dan: Alien prawns or,

Sidey: think it was a

Dan: gun or gun triggers actually just

Sidey: like blades, sword

Dan: being adapted to, to fingerprints and things that they can't.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Didn't Blade Sword do that? Because when I picked his sword

up

Reegs: that, did you guys pick

Dan: off, they had like

Cris: uh, The

Creator. It's a movie that I've seen on a plane when I came back from Thailand a few months ago. And the I can't even explain. It's like these It's like a futuristic movie.

It's

Dan: movies. Oh,

right,

Cris: the You told me it's Denzel Washington's son, the guy that's the main character. And throughout the movie there's these space ships that scan the earth. So you just see them, it's like a, like a plate that scans with a, with a laser around the earth, looking for these rebels.

And as soon as they find them, they send the army. And so they, they scan the earth and through those scans, they find any hole in the ground. Any, I think there's actually a technology these days, the way they scan the Amazon and all that. It's like a geological. scanning, but they use it for different purposes to find rebels and kill them and all that.

Sidey: nice

Cris: And the last one I have is from Batman. I can't remember. I think it's the first one with Christian Bale. where he, the doctor holds a scan. He's like, Oh your cartilage is not affected. And he's like, Oh, okay, well, no, because there's no more cartilage. And he gives him that kind of, it's like a knee brace type thing.

And he, then he kind of does a spinning back kick and he hits the wall. He's like, Oh, this is good. And he goes back to being Batman after he's beaten up. So that's. And I'm going to say for the top five, which is a bit of a strange one, but it's a true story and I'll have the scan to prove it. It's about a Romanian guy, but I'll tell you, I've sent you this in the group before.

It's quite a bizarre one, but that's a real life situation. And it's unbelievable.

Sidey: Okay

Reegs: Well, in the interest of speeding things up, then the Matrix lobby fight begins with the guns being scanned through the metal detector.

Pretty iconic. Ghostbusters has a bit of scanning shit going on. If you remember, Vince Clotho has this sort of thing on his head and he looks like, and it also has the PKE meter, which has the function of, it looks like it, basically works when you can see a ghost. So it's kind of the same as your eyes.

Uh, And the Nightmare on Elm Street movies had brain scanners. I think at one point Nancy goes to like a sleep clinic and she's they say about a really intense nightmare would be like a seven or eight on this scanner and hers things at like 20 or 30

Sidey: to 11.

Reegs: Yeah. And,

And Couple of really shit.

Well, no one, a couple of MRIs terminated Genesis, which was

Sidey: massive

Reegs: massive Turkey and they hid the, they spoiled the, the sort of big twist in the trailer. You remember that John Connor was actually a fucking robot or whatever. MRI scanner, as does a poor, unfortunate rapper in black Black Mirror.

Do you remember the, did anybody see the Black Mirror episode with, it's the one about the social media killer type thing, it's, and bees, like, automated drone y, insect y things, a rapper goes in and one comes out through his eye, it's fucking Yeah.

Sidey: Homer Simpson is frequently scanned. in The Simpsons there's the one that's like Total Recall where they're getting scanned on the way into work and he looks like an ape. in the in the visual. There's

another scan of

Reegs: where they

Sidey: another one where his they scan his brain and it's microscopically small. There's another one where they

they

x ray his head, the boxing one. Yeah, One of my favorites that one.

And realize he's got Homer Simpson Syndrome, which is a really thick skull which protects him from blows to the head. Another one where they x ray him and it's all he's all green he's got a radioactive circulatory system from years of working at the nuclear power plant.

a

Reegs: Oh, but the best one, I thought you could get to it, the crayon.

The crayon. Crayon, they scan him. He's got a crayon in his brain and he's had it all along and he's like, oh, Hibbs like, oh my thumb covered it every time we . He's

Sidey: There's also

one it's the the x files one where hans molemans being x rayed but they've forgotten about him and he's

Reegs: Yeah. He's still being zaed

Sidey: all weekend a couple

Dan: we've got to mention star trek, because he's got your voice id your basic vitals and everything And your retina scans all All in one. That would have been one of the first scanners,

Sidey: In the

Dan: the original

Sidey: handheld unit.

Dan: the handheld unit

Sidey: Yeah, the Goron,

Dan: that will that did your basic vitals, you know, McCoy.

Yeah, he's okay. And my last one then before I, you can go back after I cut you off was catch me if you can. We have oh, love it. Yeah. Well, he pretends to be a doctor. And he's got the nerve to start x raying people. Even though that he's he's clearly not a doctor.

He's just a scam artist. He's also a pilot lots of other kinds of things. So that's, that's pretty scanning.

Sidey: I just had a couple of ultrasounds Swallow, that film we watched about someone who swallows stuff.

I think She gets

ultrasounded and they see all this or is it or is it an x ray? I can't

Reegs: Your

Dan: rayed

Reegs: side.

Sidey: Yes,

thanks. And Juno, remember that one? Yeah.

Dan: Oh, pregnant.

Sidey: the the scanning Juno.

And

the mother's been kind of, like, I guess, teenage pregnancy not thrilled about it, but she's a nail technician, and as soon as they say, look, you can see the baby's fingernails. she goes, Oh

She's like on board

Dan: goes, oh. I'm interested now,

Sidey: Yeah.

So that. Any more

Dan: Okay,

well there's probably loads more, but should we have our noms

Reegs: Yeah, let's get them in.

Sidey: sounds

Dan: them in. hard to go against Wally, so I'm sticking with

Sidey: E.

Cris: got the story with the remaining guy that he's from the northern side of Romania. He's it's a true story. I have to say it because it's unbelievable that this happened.

He got drunk and he ate loads of cherries. And the more drunk he got, the more paranoid he got that he couldn't because he ate them with the pits.

Reegs: Oh, right. Arsenic. Is it, is that,

Cris: yeah, and he either read somewhere as he was getting more pissed that they're going to get stuck in his colon. And he inserted a hammer in his bum to try to break the pits.

And then he realized that the hammer went all the way in. So then he put another hammer in and then they took him to hospital. Yes. And then, and then you see there's a scan that made the Romanian headline news like five o'clock news. And there's a scan of his Like the,

Sidey: his gut

Cris: the gut and you can see the two hammerheads inside of his, of his ass cavity and then they had to take him to hospital and he had, yeah, it wasn't a pretty sight afterwards, but they interviewed him while he was on the hospital bed.

Reegs: With the hammers still in place?

Cris: they took the hammers out, but he was, you could see the bandages around his waist and he was kind of turned around and covering his face and they were, and they were like, what did, what did you try to do? Oh, I just, I just thought I need to break the, break the bits with the two hammers. So that's, that's my

Sidey: that is

some level of drunkenness.

It's

Dan: a, solid norm. What you got for his race. Can you beat that?

Reegs: Well, I was going to go with the Exorcist, but I, the story, a bizarre story. The Exorcist.

Sidey: I go for the plus tech optic film, 8,200 I

Reegs: Nice, I think that's the first time that's been in, isn't

Dan: maybe we might've had it before.

And then

Sidey: And then, yeah, hopefully we'll get some nominations online.

Cris: some non

Dan: Well, they can if they scan.

Sidey: not much in the way of

well there's some biscuits left, but we've plowed through all the sweets, already, haven't

Dan: There was some fizzy

Cris: ones.

Sidey: The biscuit y things? Yes. they're good. they're next to go.

Dan: Yeah.

we've

Sidey: and then it's

Dan: fizzy kind of laces, haven't we? Rainbow laces, cola laces.

Sidey: complained about the fizzy laces last week.

So, we

Dan: I just let, I just let her know there were better fizzes on the market.

Sidey: know that those are better.

Dan: yes,

Sidey: small packets. Yeah, yeah,

Dan: small packets

because they go so fast. We do have crisps as well. It's always a fairly cheap price. Well, it is the only choice as we discussed earlier in crisps.

Sidey: Yeah, and that segues very nicely into this week's main movie.

which is The Sapphires.

yeah, I had never seen this before.

Dan: I'd never heard of it before.

Sidey: But This was your choice,

Dan: It was

Sidey: Presumably

Cris: you come

Sidey: because it's a

true story.

I

Dan: Was speaking to a chap at work who nominated it on our behalf as much as anything else it was a

Sidey: good friends with him?

Yeah, Still, after this?

Dan: well, let's discuss it afterwards

Cris: ha,

Dan: But

it was a film. I'd never heard of and it talks

Cris: about

Dan: about issues I I wasn't aware of No, not really.

Maybe. I don't know. He hadn't really sunk in like it had through the power of this film. And and Chris O'Dowd, actually, I, I like, I mean, we watched him in the

in Sheheran. He was in that, wasn't he?

Sidey: wasn't he?

Dan: He

Reegs: was?

The IT crowd is really

Dan: in the IT crowd, but he was

Sidey: Banshees have been a sharing? yeah.

No.

Dan: I'm

Sidey: I don't think so.

Dan: I'm pretty sure he was one of the donkeys characters in there.

Sidey: Okay. I don't

recall him being in it.

Dan: but he's been in other

stuff. Yeah.

Sidey: definitely. that's He's definitely been other stuff. Yeah, He's

definitely

Dan: been in other stuff. And he was in this too, so

Sidey: that's

Cris: manager guy? He's

Sidey: Here's the manager guy. Yeah. And so it does start off with a a text. Just giving you some history of the like appalling treatment of the aboriginal people. and how

Reegs: the really shocking fact that they were classified as flora and fauna, not human.

Cris: Yeah, that was when I knew there was they were persecuted and all that. I didn't

Sidey: or something.

Cris: I didn't know how bad it was. I have to

Sidey: I mean, it was. Very

recent, really, you know, talking a long time ago, and I do remember the news of Australian governments, you know, apologizing and trying to, you know,

be like, fucking hell,

it's

Dan: Rowing back on, on really, really bad

Reegs: then their policy in right up until the early seventies of forcibly abducting light skinned children to sort

of

Dan: teach them the way of the white person. Yeah. And, and so there were some lighter skinned Aboriginal kids who were, were taken away. and

this kind of opens up early with a, a scene of like a talent show in, in

Reegs: it's

actually a birthday party. We'll find out later. Yeah.

Dan: Yeah, and there were there's some kids kind of singing on the back of a truck and And they're pretty good.

They're singing little kind of, you know, local songs and things in harmonizing

Sidey: I think it's a hymn, isn't it? The one that they, Because there's a song that they repeat throughout the film. I think it's a hymn that's been translated into

Dan: him has been translated into there. Yeah And then we have some cars coming in from the government and Everybody known what that means. They

just

Reegs: just scatter. But

Sidey: we see kids running away but we don't, we're not,

Reegs: that

Dan: because they all start running yeah, and it ain't good they ain't coming to celebrate the birthday

Reegs: 10 years

Dan: Yeah, it's 10 years later. And we find out that one of those

original singers,

one of those little girls harmonizing on the, on this birthday party was taken away and and reeducated and schooled within

the. the white people world. And yeah, we're 10 years into the future again then.

Reegs: so we pick up with the, with three of the sisters, Gail, Julie, and Cynthia. And the two elder ones, Gail and Cynthia

heard

about this talent show that's going on in town. And, They don't want to take their younger sister. She's too young to go.

And they have this like singing moment between them where, cause they've had this buildup of tension between them, it's sort of dissipated through this song and you think it's all fine, settled between them and the two older ones go off on the talent show. And then the younger one flags down the next door neighbor, I think it

Sidey: Well, I was

watching it and thinking well.

just let her go and fucking sing And then you realise when they go to sing It's not a very receptive atmosphere for

Reegs: Well, even on the way, because they're hiking for a lift and somebody shouts like, you monkey at them or something. And then when they get there, yeah, there's, it's like the most inept talent show. There's some like white women with a guitar. Who's just absolutely tragic.

And

Sidey: She's getting panned by chris. I doubt he's just making all these really sarky.

Dan: Yeah, well Chris O'Dowd's the, the accompanying piano player.

Reegs: we're introduced to him. He's sleeping in the back of his car,

Dan: In his

Reegs: in his, in his pants, and he sort of wakes up lights to SiGe, walks out in his pants, I think still to the bar to get a drink.

Yeah. And then comes on stage to do the

Dan: Absolute life dreams.

He's living the dream, isn't he? He's yeah, he's clearly Not bothered by this. Talent show or or this town?

Sidey: It's like, you know, And,

Dan: I told you not to at first. She said, we don't need

you,

Sidey: tune.

Yeah, they're,

Dan: used to in

Sidey: The elder sister in particular sees herself as the matriarch or the leader of the group.

And, but he does, he does accompany them. But

they're doing a kind of country and western thing, which if this film had come out now, would be fucking de rigueur, everyone seems to be into their country and western shit.

Dan: But he does explain as they lose the contest, to

Reegs: they're clearly miles better than everybody else.

Right? And there's not even a smattering of applause. There's just the kid from earlier, the innocent kid who's just like whooping and cheering on his own. It

Sidey: They just make Some really racist comments.

don't they? Yeah,

Cris: Yeah, but he just says that that woman is allergic to music, which I thought it was

Reegs: about the woman that they give the trophy to.

Yeah.

Cris: you can't give it to her. It's a fix. That woman's allergic to music.

Reegs: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah. And he kind of talks himself out of a job saying that in a few other words, Chris O'Dowd and finds himself outside the, the pub with the girls and trying to be their manager. Julie

Reegs: Well, Julie, Julie is the feisty youngest one.

And she has seen this advert for singers to come and sing in the Vietnam for the troops. And she, she gets, it was quite funny this bit. She's like, I can't read Mr. I can't read. Can you read it for me? Obviously just suckering him in. And then when he realizes that he's got no money, no job, his car won't start and it's 30 a week.

Or something at the

Cris: a show, maybe 30 a

Reegs: 30 a show. He's suddenly a bit more interested in it. Then there's a scene that's really curious where he has to teach them to be blacker by giving them like, what, what song does he sing with them in at this point? It's all these songs are very familiar.

Dan: all soul

Sidey: he says no,

no more country. and Western. you know, That's for Cowboys. And they were like, but we like? Cowboys? And he's like, Well, no, you're going to sing soul music. I think he does Marvin Gaye is one of the first

Cris: One of the first ones is James

Sidey: great job.

Cris: when, when they're in the car park, when the car doesn't start is James Brown. And then there's, there's a few of them, but

Dan: he, he tries to give them some kind of musical education.

Cris: only that he knows that they're going to sing. He actually says, if we're going to sing for the brothers, Because he knows that that is generally more of a, of the soldiers are gonna be a lot of black soldiers in, in Vietnam. So you have to give them soul. There has to be a bit of pain. There has to be something for them to relate to.

You can't give them country when they're in the war. So he kind of gives it, there's a reason he's not just like, oh no, you need to be more black. He's like, this is the reason

Sidey: but they, they're good at

Reegs: They are

Cris: Yeah, very good.

Reegs: and he sets up an audition for them in melbourne and then he has to go back to kamaragunja, I think

Dan: name.

Well done, yeah.

Reegs: and He has to go and talk to mum to go and get the girls

Dan: Get permission.

Reegs: permission.

Yeah

Dan: take them away, to To a war zone basically where they're going to entertain there's there's through this a few kind of little musical Montages where they're they're training or

Sidey: Well dad, dad has a way with him, doesn't he? While he's, he's gutting something with his knife and he's like, I like to keep my blade nice and sharp.

And he's like, don't worry.

Reegs: like,

Sidey: Like he reads between the lines. Don't worry, I won't let anything

Dan: you won't

Reegs: And she does reluctantly agree and this is when they put her in contact with the cousin in the city, right? Yeah.

Dan: that's right. The one who'd been abducted

Sidey: Well,

it's the The grandmother who says, no, no, no, I know where

she is. And they're like, what?

Dan: Yeah. Yeah. It's it's like the family secrets coming out what you've been in touch with. Yeah. Yeah. And they feel the other daughters they feel that they've been abandoned by her a little bit and

Reegs: Oh, well later they'll call her a really nasty insult

as

Dan: well it does cut back to one moment while she was at school.

It's a little bit late one down the film, but she'd come back and

She'd had the Education of the white man, I guess and then it said well if you guys spent more time working Rather than fishing you might actually have something and it was just kind of

Cris: Which said it, you people,

Dan: Yeah against Against the

Reegs: culture, as if she wasn't black. You're trading on her white identity under the middle class sort of. 'cause we see as well, like she's at a Tupperware party, the fashion was off the charts

Dan: Yeah.

Reegs: and the colors. So that's when she sees 'em for the first time and they say, oh, come and be part of the band.

And she like bins them off

Dan: Yeah, and her friend there who she's been living with is, Is kind of looking down her nose at them and saying, What are these people here for, you know, We don't associate with them and, and that kind of sense.

But it doesn't take too long before she abandons that old

Sidey: It's the power of song

Dan: And the power of song brings them in. And yeah, there was a nice moment in the, in the hallway actually is they've come in is a big party in a house and she turns up to it and she's not welcome until they start singing a little bit and she sings one line and then the other sisters are singing the next line and before you know it the shoulders are moving and they're in the swing of things

Reegs: and so they do go to the talent show and this is where they come up with a new name. They do an off the charts number as he taught them all to be sexy. Gail is still trying to find her identity. Is this where they've had the really harsh talk about, you're not good enough, you're not a lead

Dan: Yeah,

so this is like in the singing training montage Chris O'Dowd says, who plays,

Sidey: songs.

Dan: what's his name, Lovelace or something, Dave

Sidey: Yeah, and She says, no, I decide the songs. And it's like,

well

Dan: Do

you do you know

Sidey: and also you ain't fucking good enough to be

Dan: And the other sisters then

Sidey: she kind of takes it

it's

Reegs: true though. I mean, that is, and it does take somebody who's not in the family to say it. The girls all know it as well, because they've all got unbelievable

Sidey: Yeah,

Reegs: She does

Dan: she can hold a tune and they say look you can hold a tune, but you're not You're not

Sidey: backing vocals only.

Yeah,

Dan: you're, going to be leading.

And Cynthia is kind of, you know, the cheekiest one out of them all and goes, yeah, it should be about me. You know, she's, she's a bit delusional herself and she thinks it, but there is one good singer out of them, which is the youngest daughter the youngest sister and she is a really good singer and everybody's kind of following her around her And they've, they're up in front of the military audition.

It's like, you know, America's Got Talent or something. They're not giving much away, but then

Sidey: I'm not sure what the point of that was. They, the, the, the lady judged in the, in the middle of the three, sort of tries to play it all, you know, poker face and Dow, I'm like, it's just, you lot in a room like, what

what's the point? Just tell them if they get

Dan: they're not

Sidey: And then she smiles, goes, yeah, you're in. You're like, what?

Dan: Well, they come up with a name on the, on the spot whilst, you know, they, they said they're the, the Comundian choir girls or

Reegs: or something. Yeah,

Dan: And That goes down like a lead balloon. And as she sees her twiddling her sapphire ring then she goes, no, with their sapphires and boom.

Right? That sticks. And they're all off, they're

Sidey: Right, yeah, away you go.

Dan: Yeah.

Reegs: going the other way, you go. basically doing frottage in a little caravan with a cousin or something I think and he's like, Oh, I want to marry you or whatever. She runs out and goes, I'm getting married. And there's all the family just sat around outside it really.

But anyway, he

Dan: going to break it off as they

Reegs: But he is going to break it off as they go off to war.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: So

Dan: well as they go to a war zone.

Reegs: As they go to a war zone. And then the girls are going to get fairly slutty is when they get out there.

I did enjoy this bit.

Dan: Yeah, they well there's a lot of a lot of guys out there who are in pretty

Sidey: Riggs is just slut shaming them.

Reegs: no,

mostly what I really liked is Kay, they get out there and they meet this sort of smooth talking

Sidey: He's a bit of a guy,

Yeah.

Reegs: But he sets them up with whatever and but Kay immediately meets a guy out there.

Robbie.

Robbie, he's like this medic, I think. Yeah.

Sidey: It Becomes a bit of a klutz around.

Reegs: He's a real clutz.

He drops stuff all the time twice. He's, I felt so seen like as a comically clumsy person in real life. Like not even comically to the point where it's annoying. Like I broke two glasses the other

Cris: Yeah, you are

Dan: I'm, I'm just like the, the same as that as well.

He turns around,

Sidey: he has two episodes, he has two episodes with the same waitress.

At first He almost. like, knocks her out And he gets all embarrassed, and then she walks off, and then he turns around and completely wipes her out.

the whole,

the whole show. It's

really good. yeah,

Dan: yeah.

Sidey: Then

he keeps cropping up, like, she keeps seeing him.

Dan: So, so they've got these gigs and, and Dave Lovelace the manager, he has his own demons. He likes it. He likes a drink, he likes a bit of a party. He's not the most reliable. We already know this because he, we did. First see him like sleeping in his van and or his car going for a drink first thing in the morning and that will be a Bit of a recurring theme when it comes to arranging further gigs along, but the first few go reasonably well.

One of them's in a club in Vietnam. It's just for black servicemen and they're pretty nervous. But it goes well when they start to get into the, the swing of things and they start to get a bit of a reputation and the crowd start to get a little bit bigger. And they've also got a military detail that helps them around because it's, it's obviously Vietnam, it's the war so they've got people that are protecting them and they move up the coast from from Saigon up to like Hoi An and Nha Trang along the side there where all these US bases are.

And they, they carry on performing and, and they, you know, getting better and better.

Sidey: They're, a hit. they're

Dan: they're a hit. Yeah. People want to see them.

Well, are we about to talk of a bit where they, you know, the shit hits the fan,

Reegs: Well, there's a few things that happen

Sidey: happened. Dave and Gail.

Reegs: Dave and Gayle start growing closer

Dan: We,

I, yeah. Okay. Didn't really see this coming at all. Apparently, you know, there

Sidey: But there was a lack of on screen chemistry, I

Dan: was, there was, yeah. There wasn't any, you know, it was it was very much to this point I didn't pick anything up, but they, they.

As the girls start going out and having a bit of fun and, and looking these two just seem to bicker against each other all the time, and they're, they're fighting, so Dave and their, and their older

Reegs: the time, and they're, they're fighting, so Dave and their, and their older sister.

She does um, sort of say, look,

I didn't

Dan: sympathy at all for what Kay must have gone through. Yeah, I

Sidey: it's when we get it all explained about what did happen to her. Yeah. And then we understand the flashback

scenes

that we

had at the birthday

Dan: why

the family are a bit broken and upset

Sidey: So I think they'd come to get her and she had hidden away, but then later on they did abduct her from a hospital or something.

didn't they? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a fucking brutal. like, I think. Yeah. Awful,

Dan: yeah.

Reegs: awful. And so, you know, what's the top? Cynthia's been struggling because she has been abandoned by her fiancé and is sort of finding new loves and all that sort of stuff but they've all become also a little bit jealous of the attention that the younger sister Julie's getting which is exacerbated that when the comes through that they've got to go unescorted to a new War zone.

They're basically there to hear due leasing and the others kind of as

Dan: backup. Yeah and also dave has agreed to go up without any military protection when he was a few drinks in

Sidey: He is not really listening to the phone

Dan: cards He did take a load of money and at one point I thought is that all the band's money that he's spending on gambling? But it didn't really pursue that line. Any further?

Reegs: He did wear sunglasses when they drive. Did you notice they drove at night and he wore sunglasses?

Yeah,

No,

Dan: And , he's,

Cris: Yeah.

Sidey: night Yeah.

Dan: So, so there's, there's a few moments where they've,

Sidey: well, Cynthia gets pissed off

pissed off, doesn't she? Before a show.

Yeah. And,

And is sort

Dan: oh. During a show,

Sidey: Well, yes. the, first drinks

Crown, the first bit of the show she's just like carrying on and Not really fitting in with the how their performance is supposed to go and they call her out on it at the at an interval intermission and say You're not fucking, You need to like, wind it in, or you ain't coming back out to perform the second half of the show.

Dan: She doesn't wind it in

Sidey: And she's like, man, you fuck off. And they said, okay,

You're

Dan: out yeah, and that was the the the sisters themselves kind of managing what needs to be

Sidey: Yeah. done

Reegs: And before that show, somehow, they're having a conversation, aren't they? And it turns out, to manufacture some more tension, Chris O'Dowd is married.

So that puts a little obstacle in the way of their relationship.

Dan: Well, what the, the, the slow blossoming kind of, romance between Kay and

and

Dave Lovelace

is, is certainly put on the rocks there when that little nugget comes true.

Sidey: True.

Dan: Yeah, yeah,

And, and a little bit later,

Reegs: in which he basically says, cause he explains it was a young marriage, reckless, whatever, blah, blah.

And he basically says, Oh, if I wasn't married already, I

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: He, he, he, yeah, he, he says something romantic like that. But then he's,

Sidey: but there's an attack.

Dan: There's an attack. So they're part the way through the gig. And then they realize they're under attack. They're, the Vietnamese are starting firing. And there's a helicopter at the one end of there.

The kind of Area that they're in the the camp and they've all got a run down there two of the sisters are held up. So

Reegs: You could tell they did not have a lot of money at this point,

Dan: No, yeah, it was a bit of a budget scene, to go through there They had a tank and they like hovered loads on the tank because that's what

Reegs: that's what

Dan: But they're they're The bullets are flying people are dying left right and center all around everyone but the main characters as they get filtered in but you do see dave take one Um as

Sidey: takes the bullet as

Dan: the helicopter, goes it's a bit like platoon.

He just drops to his knees and no It's nothing like platoon. But he does drop to his knees and they see You know him being shot. And and they get the the fuck out of dodge

Sidey: I would get the most,

well, maybe not the most, but a really, like, awful example of the racism, when

Captain Clumsy is the medic on the helicopter with them and there's a white soldier who's been

Dan: No shot in the gut, isn't he and he's bleeding out.

Sidey: He's gonna die and he will rather die than accept treatment from a black surgeon, or a black medic. And he says something like, get your filthy black hands off me or something like

Reegs: think it's worse than black, I

Sidey: Yeah. He

Cris: to

the girl, to Kay, he's like, don't let that black dog Put his hands on

Sidey: Yeah, and he just dies.

He

Cris: and He dies.

Sidey: you're like, really, was that worth

Reegs: died of

Sidey: Yeah.

Cris: Which is, you know,

Dan: Yeah it was certainly, you know, showed elements of just how difficult that whole, because this is based on a true story. So they actually did

Sidey: did this, No, it's inspired.

by,

because there's almost nothing true.

about

it.

Dan: there is a group called the

Sidey: called the Sapphires.

Yeah, when you get, it'll say, well, when we finish

the

Cris: Yeah, yeah. And when you get,

Sidey: the note from

Cris: would say, well when do we finish

Reegs: Yes, the assassination.

Cris: Yes, the assassination.

1. Oh

yeah. Well, Martin Luther, yeah. And then it was even more sad that that happened, but we, we get the, the news of Martin Luther King got assassinated and then we got the news that Dave is alive. So he

Dan: And they've got a gig that night, haven't they? And they realize

Sidey: of the

Reegs: she thinks, she thinks that Dave Dave might be dead.

Obviously they're all mourning Martin Luther King as well. So she sings, having been told that she didn't have a good enough voice to sing lead, she sings lead on. sort of slow

Cris: In Memoriam.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: Not very well. I think one of the

Dan: And there's, there's a few moments actually. At one point, they're all in a hospital in, in the field.

It's like a, a hanger and you see these guys all in the hospital bed. Some with lost limbs, bandaged up heads and eyes and all the rest of it. And the, the youngest daughter starts singing Julie but she can't really hold it because she's so upset with what she's seen. But. The rest of them kind of pick up the, the, the slack if you were, and they, they work through it and it just kind of gives you the sense they're a hardworking group, but obviously the, you know, the emotion of the, the war and everything was really taken its toll at

Sidey: Yeah. Gail gets taken to see Dave, doesn't

she? Yes. And they are now just like completely and utterly an item. and then they're kind of like ported back to Australia.

Dan: Yeah, it goes, it goes quite quickly. We, and,

Sidey: they just do a rendition of a song for Gail. the locals, don't they Did you see

Chris O'Dowd tonguing his

missus? it looked like a proper, proper, like

snog.

Reegs: Yeah, but you said about the lack of sexual chemistry, this was like a brother and sister kissing and not like in the horny way in your browser

Sidey: No, I thought

Reegs: was like just grim. Like they're just nothing to though. Yeah.

Dan: No. I must admit there, there wasn't, I was surprised when I saw them. Together I didn't even see that being a part of the film to be

Sidey: It really, it really did

surprise me a

lot,

Dan: it just you just didn't feel you didn't sense any of that coming like there was any connection between them

Sidey: that, that

Reegs: wanna be right. I feel as well conscious that there's been a really horrible thing with Tom Holland and that girl that he was starring opposite Romeo and Juliet in on

Sidey: Tom Holland?

Reegs: Tom Holland is that know who it is.

Spider Man. Yeah, really horrible thing about a play that ends in publicity because, you know, saying that he's really attractive and she's not, right? So I, I feel really conscious of the backdrop of that story

Dan: don't I don't

Reegs: just about lack of chemistry. I'm not talking about their relative attractiveness or

anything.

It's

Dan: wouldn't say that Chris O'Dowd's any you know

Cris: he's not Brad Pitt. So

Reegs: Yeah. It's just like a total lack of, of any kind of romantic connection

Dan: romantic connection between them. The story ends at this performance, and

Sidey: Well, the story, The story ends at this performance and fades out to some then text about the, what actually happened with

the Sapphires.

And I think one sister had made it to Vietnam to perform.

Reegs: There were two sisters and two cousins. It wasn't four sisters like it is in the movie. One sister had made it to Vietnam. Yeah.

Sidey: So they did quite of stretch the The

truth Quite a long way.

Did, How did you feel about it on the whole?

Dan: Well, it, it was light hearted.

You know, it, it, it obviously touched on some of these more you know, important themes or serious themes. And the music, you know, I like that music, like soul music, and they sung it well. The story it went through, it seemed to have all the ingredients of what would make a film that I would really like.

I've just seen far better versions of this kind of thing. You know, the commitments, for example, I know that you're not a fan side, but it's.

it's,

way superior to this in my view. But it, it wasn't you know, it wasn't the worst film. It was like a six out of 10. I enjoyed it. It was watchable, but not really something that I would recommend highly.

You know, the,

Cris: strong recommend from Dan then

Dan: the, the, the, the chemistry, I wanted to like it

Sidey: diplomatic down,

Dan: I wanted to, I wanted to like it. I wanted

Reegs: it's, no, I think it's possible to be objective about this and say it's, you know, it's a feel good likable, sing along comedy that is really not for me. And you know, just the lack of chemistry, the plot is, a lot of it is people airing their grudges endlessly against each other.

Just for tension sake, like the whole

Dan: subject Did have a few laughs though, it wasn't like it

Reegs: but it did have a few laughs, but it's very uneven. Like it starts off really quite strong. I thought the first half an hour I was really into it and then just sags horribly and then races towards this weird conclusion. Like they just sort of Peters out to like, Oh, they all came home and they got married.

Sidey: it's like

Reegs: So, I mean, it's like a child wrote it and that's why I feel a bit like.

Dan: It was a little bit rushed in its writing. And I was interested, right at the end there, it talked about one of the brothers being the writer of the

Reegs: I feel a bit harsh. It's a bit harsh going in on

Sidey: Well, just do it

Dan: they looked

at, obviously, bringing some of these issues into this kind of film, and starting it

Sidey: are, the issues are completely valid because.

Dan: that. Yeah. All

Sidey: But they

Reegs: But they don't really resolve it in any meaningful way. She, at one point, Gail calls Kay a coconut. Yeah. Which is a really

Sidey: I always think of her

Reegs: I always think of Efe and the coconut mushroom, but Gail, she

Sidey: No, but in, no, in sorry, the Chalk Eyes, it was a football one, wasn't it? Someone, Is it Rio got called

Chalk Eyes?

Dan: maybe. Yeah.

Sidey: anyway. We don't know what, what did you think Chris?

Cris: we don't know what, what do you think, Chris? What, about, I don't know what chokhaid means.

Sidey: means.

Someone got, it was like they were black. Only black on the outside. Inside they were

Cris: Oh, right, oh yeah, I

film itself. The

film itself yeah, no. It was, it was a hard watch.

I told you, I watch it with Kara. And we were like, all right, I came last night, went for lunch, whatever came. I was like, what do you want to watch? I've got this movie. You know, I looked at it, the Sapphire soul music sisters going to Vietnam was all right. It's music. You should technically enjoy this with me.

And half an hour in, she just started doing her time

Sidey: time

Cris: me

Reegs: That is a damning

Sidey: I know it's

Cris: looked at me. Are you enjoying this? All right, we'll Not really, but I have to watch it and he said, oh, yeah, I'm just gonna do my I'm just gonna work So that's

Dan: out. Yeah, it

Cris: yeah, I mean again

I

kind of agree. I don't want to be too bad, but it's more of a four or three out of ten

Reegs: if you're interested in those, Rabbit Proof Fence is the movie to watch that explores the

Dan: generation, these kind of themes in a little more detail.

Cris: I'm happy I learned about that and I was, I knew that there was a problem with the Aboriginal people and I knew that they, they were really persecuting them. I didn't know the extent of it.

Dan: I didn't know about the abductions

Cris: that little bit at the beginning and the way they were called and all these things in the fauna flora and all that, I'm, I'm, I'm sad that it happened, but I'm happy that I know about this and maybe I'll read up more and I'll know more facts about it.

I'm still not really interested in visiting Australia anyway. I did find it quite funny that they went to Vietnam from Australia and this girl sees a spider and she's like, oh my god, spider. I

Reegs: She didn't even know where she was going.

She kept saying she was going to thailand. Yeah So

Cris: so again, it's, but yeah, strong

Dan: Yeah, there was a couple of little laughs like that. Yeah. And it was, Yeah, it could have just been just missed something. Maybe it was in the the characters themselves or that the actors themselves that the casting Wasn't quite didn't have that chemistry and it didn't make you believe, you know, there was much in between them.

But What did you think side?

Sidey: It's like Christmas come early for me. Yeah

This is a massive turkey. I just thought it was rubbish. Aside from, you know, making observations about fucking appalling treatment of people that happened at the time. The film is not very good. Sat down, my daughter came in and said, Oh, we'll have a watch of this.

She got up and walked off and she looked at me and goes, It's alright, you don't have to pause it for me.

Dan: I

Sidey: I

don't know, I thought the characters were like, fairly thinly written. Nothing really believable about any of the relationship, Well, certainly the the romantic stuff that was going on. and Yeah, it just was a shame. I could listen to the soundtrack all day long I mean the soundtrack was really good.

Reegs: Says

Sidey: says inspired by it at the start I always get like, oh it's not great.

It

Reegs: style. What did

Dan: did

the metrics say? Did you pill up

Sidey: I did put up the metrics. Yeah they, What I did notice, and I was aghast when I was doing this, it has, this shows you why we don't really pay much, you know.

attention to the

metrics And better metrics than the birds which we reviewed for

Wednesday. Which yeah, wow indeed.

Yeah, financial stats 10 million.

Yeah,

Dan: right.

Cris: it made 10 million.

Sidey: No,

it had

a budget of ten

Cris: million.

Okay. It didn't

look like

Sidey: like it. It

Dan: have really flown them out to vietnam.

Reegs: I think actually that's what made it look cheap, those scenes, because the other scenes were

Dan: Yeah,

Reegs: scenes in the outback.

Dan: I I don't know whether you'd like think it broke even but I don't think you'd have done any better than that

Reegs: Domestically in Australia it might have done that. Ten, I'll say the same.

Dan: Okay, okay,

Cris: say. I'm just trying to

Sidey: I mean I had never heard of

Dan: No,

Cris: that, was it that

Sidey: yeah back in the good old days. I had never heard of It and now I have I, it's like a a mediocre recommend for me.

Dan: Yeah, it's, it's a strong recommend if you want an Australian soul movie film about Aboriginals in Vietnam that isn't really true.

Reegs: Yeah,

Cris: well done.

Dan: What's this up my sleeve? A little bit of magic.

Reegs: Oh, if you'd have done a trick there, I would have loved it. I was getting ready for

Dan: have loved it. I

Sidey: trick that works on an

audio based platform.

The kids show,

it doesn't

filter through to the kids.

Dan: kids. 13. Is, is, is kids

Sidey: for a good few minutes researching for it on my daughter's profile.

Dan: is, kids that are 13 plus, so. It's

Sidey: It's the magic

Prank show with Justin Willman. I've seen other things with Justin

Willman.

I think he's got a, Netflix deal because I'm sure. I've seen some other

Dan: things.

Reegs: Magic for Humans was

Sidey: The best

Dan: there, there was a, a few others, but this was my debut for this kind of show.

Sidey: He's like. Street magician. kind of Illusions and sleight of hand and that sort of thing. But this is, he's, he's put a plea out to people to say

Reegs: Wait, wait, wait, just before we start, because I think it is important. Do you like magic? Because some people are just like, no, I don't like it, But,

Dan: yes, But

Sidey: like all these things

Yes.

The,

lot of the times, you know, it's the same make something disappear or make something look like something that it's not.

So Really it's dependent on whether the guy doing the person delivering the thing is good, has charisma.

Reegs: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sidey: You know, can work an audience and do all that sort of stuff.

Reegs: Just to stop you for half a second going, how the fuck did he do that? And just enjoy it. Like the

Sidey: f k did he, he's decided to.

Put

a thing out to the public say if you want me, yeah, i'll i'll happy to like Get someone back if if you've been being pranked or if you want to prank someone Give me a shout. And the best ones i'll i'll work

with you on it and we'll prank

someone.

Dan: and so Lowly, he brings up all these tweets loads of people got in touch and he chose. Two for this particular

Sidey: Well he says the first thing the most Common request was from

Dan: Yeah, which was, which was interesting actually, you know, you think of all the times your, your brother or your sister has played a mean trick on you.

And how a lot of those can be running jokes in the family and just things that it's the gift that keeps us on giving, you know, When you're tricking your, your brother or your sister it can be lots of, lots of fun or, or, or not. And so, we, we meet one chap who's his sister keeps putting this scary head, this kind of doll's head,

Sidey: Yeah, the mother was

Reegs: hairdresser

Sidey: and this was the, the hair, the mannequin head that she would

Dan: Yeah, so it's quite, it's quite lifelike or you know, scary anyway. And you can imagine if you're of a sensitive disposition, which this this brother looks like, you know, he didn't, he wasn't like a Marine or anything, was he? If you, if you're waking up after a long night's sleep or a tough night or whatever, and this head is like, Next year the horse's head out of fucking the godfather's.

I mean you're waking up with that. It just gives you a momentary spook,

Sidey: And this is his younger sister who had done this to him many

Dan: Many many times over the years so he wanted to

Sidey: her killed,

Dan: get back and the other story if we work at

Reegs: Gloria, wasn't it?

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: And the other story then if we if we kind

Sidey: other guy deserved more than a fucking prank,

Reegs: Yeah, this was weird. Passing this off as being like, Oh, wasn't it funny the time that he outed me to my family by reading through my diary?

Dan: Yeah, So

Sidey: I mean, you'd expect

him to be beaten to a bloody

pulp? for that.

Dan: So his, his brother had outed him to his family, although I think they may have suspected before then.

Sidey: Yeah, but

Dan: but yeah, they've, he's,

that's

Sidey: then the brother,

Dan: been taken

Sidey: the guy who

had done the outing

then, had also a very specific fear about AI. and robots.

Reegs: robots! Yeah, this was fucking amazing.

Dan: two stories kind of working and he's got

a team behind him who will go through how they're going to perform this track these

Reegs: he's got like, yeah, like you say.

Dan: And how they're gonna, you know, scare the shit out

of

Sidey: kind of takes the magic out of it. But anyway,

Dan: as much as possible. But, they're, they're plotting. They are absolutely plotting to go quite heavy on, on the scare o meter.

Sidey: So,

so the guy,

Reegs: do the two stories, but we might as well just do one after the other, otherwise it'll get confusing to go backwards and forwards,

Sidey: Gloria is obviously and the, and the episode is called Heads Will Roll, And so Gloria one is right, she's been scaring you with this dummy head thing we are going to do something to your head To scare her.

Reegs: Yeah.

Dan: But first of all, we're gonna bring her into like a

Reegs: Oh, well, no, but the

Dan: to really relax her and really make her feel kind of, you know, drop her guard.

Reegs: test prank though that, 'cause

Sidey: I wish that was it

Reegs: because it shocked me. Yeah. They get him to lie down, he's gonna get his muscles stretched or whatever, and they put a towel over his head and as he stretches his leg, they, they'd have a sap because they practice it in front of it and his head just

Sidey: Yeah. This is far, far better than what they did.

Reegs: I was, like, genuinely shocked that that would, like, properly traumatise you, I

Dan: And, and yeah they thought, oh there was a bit too much blood, and back to the drawing board with that one.

But it would, it would have been a good

Reegs: No, she says you want to draw it out because they're complete sadists

Dan: Yeah, yeah that's right. So, they're going to get him. to go into a machine,

Sidey: Cryo kind of de

Dan: yes, somebody says, look, 20 seconds at this at minus 80 degrees, and you're going to feel great as ever.

It's going to be brilliant. So he's after they've gone through, they've had a bit of a massage, they've relaxed down and they've just got a

Sidey: a bit of a massage, they've relaxed down, and they've just got a This tells you right, that's it's done Let's get over the prank and they show you how they've built the set and all the sort of fake equipment And they've got these massive tanks of what i imagine is supposed to be Nitrogen or something.

And he Basically has to stand up Put his head in a box when they close the lid and they've shown you all kinds of different head tricks in the build up to this and

Dan: the build up to this.

It just looks confused at first.

Sidey: Yeah. the alarm goes

off

Dan: And it's like, Oh shit.

Sidey: confused at first. Yeah. And he's like, Oh shit. Oh God.

And he's he's like flummoxing around trying to like press the button

and

Dan: and it carries on for a little bit

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: It carries on for a little bit longer. They they do drag it out and then they open the, the door.

Reegs: no, he's fine. Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: And it's a nice

Dan: Well, they've, they've got a frozen mould of his face, haven't they?

And they've been timing this, you know, they've got it too long and it's gonna melt. You know, we need to get it just right, but they've got his frozen kind of feared face

Sidey: And obviously you can see the rest of his body and his hands are holding on to the platform. and so she's

like, what the fuck, what the fuck?

And they actually

Reegs: They pull the head out, this is amazing this bit, and he drops it on the floor and he like comically slides about in it.

And he shouts, call 911, but don't tell them why.

Sidey: them why. Then

he's

Dan: and then he's asking her to pick up the pieces and and sort of cramming it back into the box and everything and Said oh we can we can return we can reverse

Sidey: need a little bit of it, We don't need it all.

Dan: Yeah,

that's it

Sidey: and then

Reegs: Her reaction is disbelief.

It's sort, not expressed disbelief, but just can't believe what's

Sidey: fuck, what the fuck is happening

Dan: Yeah. Yeah.

You

can see that she's taken in a little bit

Sidey: still, but like

obviously like, that's not happened.

Reegs: does look alarmed at first when he, when he stops talking and all that stuff, and

Dan: Yeah, no, she, and it goes because they do draw it out. There isn't just over and. Three or four seconds they're drawing this out for a few minutes and there's enough people running around panicking enough alarms going off And enough hidden cameras for us to see kind of all these different reactions to think well I don't know for how long but for a little bit of time.

She was worried. She had a kind

Sidey: of, but they, they, they do shove some of

the ice back in and they, they show it, you know, BBBB And then open it and he's just there grinning

and she lasts. Oh LS, it's not really

Dan: and, and this is why, and he shows her Gloria's head and and she can't believe it and they, they're closer than ever. And we move on to the next one. So this is like a half an hour show. So we've got these two pranks and the other one is this AI.

So he's been outed.

Reegs: He, but he already believes the brother.

So there's Kendrick, who is the guy who was outed and Ken Dale, who is like this business, they set him up with like a LinkedIn, he's like, Oh, I'm going to get a new job guys. I'm off to go and get a new

Dan: They, they, they really go

Reegs: And he already believes that robots from the government are going to

Sidey: Yeah.

he's probably, I think he's a QAnon, I think he's, He's

definitely going to

Dan: halfway there already

Sidey: he's going to be into it.

Dan: And so the, the main guy, the main magician is he's got a face mold which is really kind of convincing as well. Himself. And he's gonna be swapped out. So he's gotta learn these kind of robotic moves.

Sidey: Best bit

of the whole show.

Reegs: They get this TikTok kid

Sidey: this guy.

Reegs: He was unbelievable.

Sidey: I could've watched Half an hour. Just this guy.

Oh,

Dan: Oh, he is brilliant. Yeah, he did have

Sidey: So, he's got to learn the magic because what they're gonna do is show the robot version being built and then classic classic distraction. Flip the thing round so that it becomes

Dan: Yeah, it's like it's a bit like bullies board, isn't it?

It's just you got the minute until the bullies board turns around. So it

Sidey: it just

Everything yeah, he's been

Dan: Everything yeah, he's been plugged in So the premise is that he's he's gonna have a conversation while all the scientists are there

Reegs: there.

Dan: then the scientists

Reegs: out before it's even started, right?

He's like, cause they're like, oh, they come over with like a headset. He's like, no, I don't Bluetooth. I won't wear a headset.

Dan: Yeah, he doesn't want anything to do with it and he's, as the scientists get called off the robot wakes up and then starts talking and goes, I know about Colorado, and, you know, or whatever,

Reegs: Your nickname Daddy Dale or

Dan: yeah, I know where you live, and

Sidey: gave himself that

Dan: and, and things were, Only he would know, or his brother, um

Reegs: um Just on that point, right, self anointed nicknames really, really annoy me. There

Sidey: going to say, Have you ever given yourself a nickname?

Reegs: No,

Sidey: no. because No normal person would do that?

Reegs: No, but I know someone who did. He was like everybody's like, Oh, you can just call me Hendrix now. And I'm like, what? But

Sidey: though I

Dan: I remember, I remember my sister knew this guy once, and he goes, you can call me Ledge.

And we were like,

Yeah.

Reegs: it

Dan: it was like,

Sidey: in the guy who met at the windowsill.

Dan: It was just like, no, what's your name mate? He is like, Colin . Right, okay.

Sidey: So they, I think at one

point they take the head off and put it on the table, don't they? Yeah. And he starts

Reegs: and then he convinces himself. He's like, oh, this is exactly what I thought the government were gonna steal my body

Sidey: because it goes to and replace me. It goes to them. are you, is this guy connected to the internet?

Dan: going, no, no, that would be really dangerous. No, we wouldn't do that. And he's going well, he's been telling how would he know this that and what he was talking to afterwards So you've got all these actors scientists that are not having to walk this guy too far down the path

Reegs: Oh, honestly, he must have had a full psychotic episode after this, I

Sidey: he'd

Dan: And he he really wanted to escape they had to talk him back into sitting down again and Anyway, when his brother Brother finally yeah, he's about to freak out big time,

Sidey: They should have let him. The fuck guy's an

Dan: Yeah, he really was. And and they realize, oh, here's your brother in the big reveal and everything. And he's suitably chastised and scared. But yeah, it was quite brutal. This wasn't it? I mean, I

Sidey: it's not nearly brutal enough I

thought it was really boring to

be honest. I've had way more fun talking about it than I did

when I was

Dan: I thought it

Reegs: Well, there's so little magic in it.

Sidey: I find the justin guy Of all the like magicians I can think of that are on the telly. He's so bland He just, I don't know, there's no edge to it.

Reegs: Honestly, mostly the magicians should be like silent or say fuck all really because

as soon as they open their mouth they ruin

Sidey: He's really vanilla and the thing is with magic, I know this isn't

this isn't, magic per se, it's like pranks with a bit of sort of cleverness to it.

But when they start showing you everything, like what's the surprise to it? I don't know.

Dan: showing everything, like, what was the surprise to it?

I don't know. I know. They did really strike

Reegs: I know they did really strike me, especially that second one.

I was like,

this is all a bit scripted really, isn't it this

Dan: I mean, they've tried to make it a little bit of fly on the wall kind of stuff so you can see these people's reactions through sort of hidden cameras and things like that. But I watched it and thinking, well, this is, aimed at kids and and some, and I've not watched any of the others.

This was season one, episode one, the heads will roll. But I thought it was I thought it was all right. I quite liked it. And I thought it was just a bit darker and edgier than other magic shows that I'd seen because it was trying to pull the wool over somebody's eyes and, and You know, make them feel really uncomfortable for something that they, some pranks or whatever that they pulled before.

So, yeah, I, I, I quite liked it.

Sidey: Not,

Dan: You're not for you. No,

Cris: I've

never even watched

Dan: there you go. That's magic, Chris.

Reegs: And as a, as a fan of magic, I was a bit meh. I would like to have seen more magic is what I would have

Dan: would have said. Yeah, there was a lot of

Sidey: minutes, They could have had four pranks.

Like it didn't need to be.

Also, I

Reegs: I couldn't stop thinking, like, how much it would have cost them to set up those things in the first place for them, for them to fuck it up. Like, I don't think they can afford to, because it doesn't look like there's a massive budget on the show, so maybe the whole thing is, like, scripted

Dan: Yeah, you'd have you'd have to watch more to see I think I

Sidey: to be

Dan: to to be to be convinced of You know the the participants whether they were genuine or or not I'd like to think they were otherwise it really would be pants, but

Reegs: Um,

Strong recommend. Go, very

Sidey: it shows you how to do the tricks and you're like

Yeah strong recommend

Reegs: a

Dan: go go go for that

Wow, what a week. Maybe the strongest we've ever had? Gotta be up there.

Cris: Close.

Sidey: bigliest week we've ever had. Yeah. Yeah. I think Christian is going to nominate which means I think we're getting an Idris Elba.

Cris: I have all the movies ready, everything. I was gonna ask you because I can't really remember all of it. The if it's 1980, that is midweek,

Dan: That is midweek.

Cris: It's a movie called the gods must be crazy. 1980 I'm yet to discover.

Reegs: think I've seen

Dan: I

Cris: I'm yet to discover it's a two parts or three series.

This is the first one it's in 1980 and I think it's South African production with the action happening. It's, it's, I I've seen it before and I really remember it.

Dan: one.

It's South African, is it?

Cris: Yes. Yeah.

And I'm yet to figure out on which streaming service this will be available on. Beasts of No Nation, 2015 Netflix with Idris Elba.

Kids thing, Tales of Africa 16 minutes on Netflix, Episode 1. It's only one season. I think it's seven episodes and it's each episode there's a guy It's a cartoon, but it's all traveling to different African countries and telling a story about the country.

Sidey: about the country.

Cris: Top five. I wasn't sure if I can do dictators.

Sidey: you can't dick takers

Cris: Is that, is that okay with you?

Dan: I'm gonna have to

Cris: if, if that was impossible, we, I w I was thinking either deserts or crocodiles, but

Reegs: I think we might, have we done deserts before? I don't know. Dictators. Yeah.

Cris: dictators. Yeah. Would that work?

Dan: to have to give this the Idris Elbow because

Sidey: you're away you're traveling

Dan: travelling.

I'll be in the land of clocks and cheese.

Yeah.

Reegs: you're going to. de escalate the man cave's defense systems

Dan: do, yes, we

Cris: It'll be the sca it's the

Dan: scan

You, you'll just have a scan, that's right, and you'll be able to, and, and you're allowed in,

Sidey: Well, That's

good then.

Dan: going to be another terrific week. Yeah, all that

Sidey: Yeah, Sidey's signing out.

Reegs: Riggs has left the building. Lot

Cris: left the

Dan: gone.